Bat 'n' Ball Games #12

Batty (1987)
By: Elite  Genre: Bat 'n' Ball Players: 1  Difficulty: Medium-Hard
Featured Version: ZX Spectrum  First Day Score: ???,???
Also Available For: Commodore 64, Amstrad CPC

One of the great things about being an 8-bit home-micro owner in the 80s was not only the many cool magazines we got (or our parents got for us), but that the mags often included cover-mounted tapes that featured demos of new games and other bits and pieces. On the odd, rare occasion, however, they had been known to feature a full game! This was a time of celebration and revelry, even if it was often short-lived when the game turned out to be as much fun as shovelling rhino poop without a shovel. BUT!! One game has gone down in legend as being more fun than any kind of poop-shovelling, and that game is... Batty, shockingly! Yes, that's right, 'mounted' on the cover of the October 1987 issue of Your Sinclair was a cassette containing the full Batty game! I mean, it was never going to be another Lords of Midnight but it was still a full game which was obviously wonderful news to us cash-strapped urchins.

Film Round-Up #37

Taken Trilogy (2008 - 2014)
Directed By: Pierre Morel, Olivier Megaton Starring: Liam Neeson, Maggie Grace, Famke Janssen, Forest Whitaker, Leland Orser, Jon Gries, David Warshofsky, Katie Cassidy, Dougray Scott, Xander Berkeley, Olivier Rabourdin, Arben Bajraktaraj, Rade Šerbedžija, Sam Spruell

Certificate: 18 Running Time: Approx 294 minutes

I grew up during an excellent era of action stars on the silver screen. We had Arnie at his peak, Sly during his Rocky/Rambo years, Van Damme, Steven Seagal and other martial-arts wizards, countless more if you had access to Far-Eastern cinema too, but whichever ones you watched, most of them had something in common - they were young and they pretty much only featured in action films. Go forward 25-odd years and we were given a new action star that nobody could have predicted - Liam Neeson, a serious, award-winning actor in his mid-50s? No, it hadn't been a prank, and the middle-aged thespian apparently took to it like a duck to water too. The first we got to see of him in this new guise was Taken, produced and co-written by Luc Besson. It was so successful it probably came as a surprise even to the Frenchman and Neeson himself, and before long there was a trilogy, all centred around Neeson's Bryan Mills, former Green Beret and highly effective CIA agent.

Mobile Games #11

Bloo Kid (2011)
By: Winterworks / Corona Labs Genre: Platform Players: 1 Difficulty: Easy-Medium
Featured Version: Android Also Available For: iOS

I discovered this appealing-looking game quite a while ago now - a couple of years, probably - when I happened to see its sequel on sale in the Steam store. My OCD won't allow me to play that first though, so I had to track down the first game. Happily, I found it's a free (with ads) Android game, and of a type I enjoy a lot, namely a single-screen platformer. As appealing as that was though, it also set off an alarm. Games of this type are frequently a lot of fun but they also generally require quick and precise movements - would that be possible with a mobile game? I now own a Bluetooth game pad but it doesn't seem to work with this game, so I guess I had little choice but to find out how good (or bad) the touchscreen controls were. Let's hope it's the former!

First Look Amiga #2

Inviyya by Tigerskunk / Polyplay (2021) - Amiga

I don't really have time to keep up to date with most indie/homebrew scenes these days and that sadly includes the lively community of Amiga fans, so I'm sure there are tons of great games/projects that I've missed. Even I managed to stumble on Inviyya though, a new hori shmup which looked frankly remarkable from the screenshots I saw. Happily the kind team behind the game gave me a digital review copy (there is also a superb full physical version available) and, after an embarrassing yet characteristic period of procrastination, I sat down to give it a good play prior to writing a full review. Unfortunately, after working out how to get the game running on the rather complicated WinUAE emulator, I soon ran into some as-yet-unresolved technical issues. Until such time as these issues are ironed out, I thought I'd make a quick post to give my first impressions on what looks to be a corker.

Film Review #118

Those Who Wish Me Dead (2021)
Director: Taylor Sheridan Starring: Angelina Jolie, Finn Little, Jon Bernthal, Nicholas Hoult, Aidan Gillen, Jake Weber, Medina Senghore, Tyler Perry

Certificate: 15 Running Time: 100 Minutes

You don't seem to see the once-prolific Ms. Jolie in much these days but my wife is a fan (shouldn't that be the other way around?) so this recent HBO novel adaptation was very much on the agenda as soon as it was available. Set in the wild country of Montana, it stars her (Jolie, not my wife) as Hannah, a former 'smokejumper' (someone who is parachuted to the site of a wildfire to provide first response action and advice about directing further firefighting efforts). She is now stationed at a fire lookout tower after three young campers recently died on her watch leaving her traumatised and unsure of herself. Stumbling into her neck of the woods (chortle!) is Owen, a forensic accountant on the run from some hoodlums with his sole remaining child Connor (Little), after said hoodlums whacked his boss and family when Owen discovered some nefarious activity on the part of their boss Arthur (Perry). When Owen is fatally shot, he gives the evidence to young Connor and tells him to run.

Lynx Games #2

Gauntlet: The Third Encounter (1990)
By: Atari Genre: Maze / Run 'n' Gun Players: 1-4 Difficulty: Medium
Featured Version: Atari Lynx First Day Score: 44,816
Also Available For: Nothing

When I was younger I loved the two Gauntlet games. I had them on a compilation (I forget which now) for my Speccy, and my local arcade had the full-on four-player version of the first game there for years, so I had lots of opportunities to do my Gauntleting. They were very high-profile games too, but it wasn't until years later I realised... where the hell was Gauntlet 3? Well, as it turned out, there were two different takes on a third game in the series and neither was anywhere near as high-profile as the first two. One was made by Software Creations for the 8 & 16-bit home micros and was not very Gauntlet-ish. The other was developed by Epyx and released only on the handheld console they developed - the Lynx. Would it prove to be any more Gauntlety than the weird home micro offering? Yes it would, as it turns out, but it's still far from a typical Gauntlet game.

Game Art Gallery #2

Most of my fellow UK retro gamers will probably remember the various Psygnosis adverts that appeared in magazines like C&VG and Ace back in the late 80s and early 90s, and for a majority of us they will be something we remember fondly. I've recently been looking into these in a bit more detail and found a few that I'd never even seen before. After careful consideration, I posted my Top Five a few months back, but there were some tough choices and the ones that didn't make the list deserve to be seen too. I therefore now present what I believe to be the complete Psygnosis adverts gallery! Well, the ads in this style at least, but I'm probably wrong anyway (grunkle). I've also tried to tidy/touch up some of the images too. Hope you like them, and let me know of any I missed :)

 

Film Round-Up #36

As you may remember, I did a round-up of Sandra Bullock films a few months back, but round-ups here at Red Parsley generally consist of five films and I accidentally watched six. I therefore had little choice to watch four more films featuring the lovely Virginian and post another round-up here! This wasn't a hardship if I'm honest - she's not exactly tough on the eyes after all (snigger!) - so behold, here's another selection of films starring or featuring this mighty appealing actress:

The Net (1995)

This is one of those ones I knew of in its day but never got around to watching, so this was my first time! As the name may suggest, it's a 'techno-thriller' starring Ms. Bullock as Angela Bennett who is a systems analyst who lives through her computer (yes, that was even possible in the mid-90s!). When a friend sends her a spooky hacker program, however, she thereafter finds herself targetted by a ghastly group of cyberterrorists who have stolen her identity, planted a fake one where she's a junkie hooker, and are chasing her for that magical 3.5" 'floppy' that houses such important data. Placed firmly in the 'English bad guy' role is Jeremy Northam as the main hoodlum chasing Angela (after quite literally 'pumping' her for information, obviously). Despite the understandably-outdated computery stuff though (or even partly because of it!), this was looking like a decent thriller at first. Bullock plays the out-of-her-depth-loner well as she suddenly finds herself with no home, money, or anything else, and she remains as likeable as ever in the process. Sadly, no one else stands out and the plot does go downhill somewhat in the final act, so it's left to its radiant star to just about ensure this one is still worth a watch... 6/10

Nintendo 64 A-Z

The poor old N64 has many detractors in the snobbier parts of the retro community, and I can kind of see their point(s) to a degree, but there are many good things about Nintendo's 64-bit system too. I've always been a fan of it in any case - it's home to a few of my very favourite games so how could I not be? This list will include those and hopefully all other games released for it. Up next is:

C is for...

California Speed (1999)

Although a product of some big names (Atari/Midway), this one is quite obscure to many since it was only released in the US for some reason. It does seem worth some attention though - it's an ultra-arcade-style racing game and there are lots of courses with many having some very unique or even bizarre sections.

Bomberman Series - Part 15

Super Bomberman 2 (1994)
By: Hudson Soft  Genre: Maze  Players: 1-4  Difficulty: Medium
Featured Version: Nintendo SNES  First Day Score: 38,500
Also Available For: Nothing

I was a big fan of Bomberman right from the first game of his that I played, namely Super Bomberman for the SNES, so it was a significant surprise when I found out years later that there ended up being four more games in the series! The fourth and fifth games were only released in Japan so I kind of have an excuse there, but the second and third ones? How did I not hear about them? I blame the pesky magazines of the day which must have failed to cover them. Yes, that must be it. Hmm, anyway, this of course means I've never played this particular Bomberman game before, nor any later games in the SNES/SFC series, which makes them among the few games in the traditional style I've not played. Happily, things looked very familiar from the moment I started it. There is of course a silly backstory to facilitate the action, this time involving the 'Five Dastardly Bombers' who apparently want to take over the universe - an ambition that has prompted them to take over five worlds.

First Look Amiga #1

International Truck Racing by Zeppelin Games (1992) - Amiga

I was actually looking at a different Amiga game when I happened to see this one - an overhead racer featuring trucks? I've seldom been one to pass up an overhead racer so I promptly sought this out to see if it was any good. Strangely, despite trailer-less trucks on the title screen (just like real life truck racing), the examples in the game are all towing sizeable trailers behind them. This unsurprisingly makes the racing a bit trickier as each vehicle is rather large. On top of that, your own 'rig' (though not any of the other five racers, it seems) has a damage-meter as well as finite fuel which means regular visits to the pits are required. You do get to choose which truck you want to use but there doesn't seem to be any difference between them performance-wise, so I guess it's just a case of picking your favourite colour (sadly there isn't a green one) and putting your foot (or indeed finger) down.

Film Round-Up #35

Back to the Future Trilogy
(1985 - 1989 - 1990)
Directed By: Robert Zemeckis Starring: Michael J. Fox, Christopher Lloyd, Thomas F. Wilson, Lea Thompson, Crispin Glover, Mary Steenburgen, James Tolkan, Claudia Wells, Elisabeth Shue

Certificate: PG Running Time: Approx 343 minutes

A couple of weeks ago now I decided to do a 'Top Five Movie Moments' post for the original Back to the Future, and in order to do 'research' for this I thought it was best to watch it again. This was of course just an excuse to... well, watch it again! It must be one of my top ten most watched films of all time already, and was also one of the first films I watched many times along with Star Wars and No Retreat, No Surrender. Unsurprisingly therefore, I enjoyed it immensely this time as well. So much so, in fact, that I ended up watching the sequels too, which I rarely do as they never quite did it for me the way the original does. I mean, I enjoy them for the most part, but more because I get to spend more time with the great characters from the first film rather than them being great films in their own right. I suppose they are at least good films, they just pay the price for being sequels to a far greater film. Anyway, however possibly-foolish this opinion may be, I figured I might as well make a brief post here about them here! To that end, I present:

PS4 Purchases #12

Wonder Boy: The Dragon's Trap by Lizardcube / Dotemu (2017)

Any observant regular visitors here might remember that I've posted about this game before. Indeed, there was a preview and a review of the Steam version that I've had for many moons, but when a game is as wholly wondrous as this one, the prospect of a physical copy to keep for many ages of our world is a mighty appealing one. I had this PS4 version on my Amazon wishlist pretty much since I had the Steam version, and then, to my not inconsiderable delight, I received it as a gift for my last birthday! Its 'main' cover is typical of the lovely new artwork found in the remade game. It still looks delightful and I can now look at it whenever I want. But I soon discovered the game comes with a reversible cover, the other side of which features some nice, rather more CGI-ish artwork. Upon opening the case, however, there was something else I noticed before I discovered this alternative cover.

Neo Geo Games #2

Magician Lord (1990)
By: Alpha Denshi / SNK Genre: Platform/Fighting Players: 1 Difficulty: Hard
Featured Version: SNK Neo Geo MVS First Day Score: 32,040 (one credit)
Also Available For: Neo Geo AES & CD (ports), PS2, PSP, Wii (on compilations)
Download For: Wii Virtual Console, PSN, Xbox Live

Although the Neo Geo is generally known these days for its one-on-one fighting games, shoot 'em ups, and perhaps also the skillish Metal Slug series, the first run of games for SNK's powerhouse was actually a bit more varied. One of the many standout titles was Magician Lord, a shooty-platformer which takes place in a probably-ancient land called Cadacis which has become consumed with chaos and evilness again after many years of peace. This is all down to a foul sorcerer known as Gal Agiese who has escaped from his magical prison and wrought havoc upon the land. The only hope for the fair people of Cadacis is some guy called Elta who is apparently the 'last descendant' of the much-fabled Magician Lord of old who previously vanquished the heathenous Gal Agiese and his demonic buddies. Quite why he's the last descendant, though, I don't know, maybe he's impotent.

ColecoVision A-Z

Several consoles appeared in the early 80s which were intended to compete with, even supplant the mighty Atari VCS. The effort by Coleco Industries was pretty decent, but sadly their... umm, vision I guess, was thwarted by the 'great videogame crash'. Here, over time, I will take a look at all the system's games. This is one of five posts to that end and features all games beginning with letters K through M:

Ken Uston's Blackjack-Poker (1983)

Okay, I've no idea who Ken Uston is and I don't really have any interest in poker. Nor, I wouldn't have thought, did this title suit the usual Coleco demographic. As far as I can tell, though, it plays a reasonable enough game of blackjack, and probably poker too, and supports up to four players, so if card games are your bag, baby...

TV Shows #23 - Part 1

The Flight Attendant Season One (2020)
Developed By: Steve Yockey
Starring: Kaley Cuoco, Michiel Huisman, Zosia Mamet, Rosie Perez, T. R. Knight, Michelle Gomez, Colin Woodell, Merle Dandridge, Griffin Matthews, Nolan Gerard Funk, Deniz Akdeniz

Certificate: 15 Running Time: 42-48 Minutes per Episode, 8 Episodes

Tagline: "A Deadly Mystery With a Turbulent Descent."

Love it or hate it, no one could deny that The Big Bang Theory was a huge hit for all involved and the main stars made so much money they could live comfortably for the rest of their lives without ever having to work again. Perhaps some of them will but Kaley Cuoco apparently had other ideas. Back in 2018, you see, Chris Bohjalian wrote a novel called The Flight Attendant and Ms. Cuoco, via her production company, optioned it the previous year. I'm not sure how a novel can be optioned before it has even been released - perhaps she employed the use of witchcraft or is somehow able to manipulate the fabric of the space-time continuum? However it was done, this would've been while she was still working on Big Bang Theory so she was clearly already making plans for the future.

First Look PC #6

Raider Kid and the Ruby Chest by Cacareco Games (2021) - PC

As is often the case with me, I saw this game somewhere and it caught my eye but it has taken me so long to post about it here that I've totally forgotten where I saw it. It has even changed names (slightly) since I first saw it! Oh well, doesn't matter now I guess. What does matter is the game itself which did and still does remind me of Rick Dangerous at first glance. It comes to us via a Portuguese (?) indie developer called Cacareco Games who have made their adventure in the style of a Game Boy Color game which, I think you will agree, is something they succeeded in. There is a simple backstory which I believe involves the pipsqueak of the title getting separated from a tourist party near some ancient ruins of some sort. So naturally, instead of looking for help he crawls inside the ruins and starts snooping around and soon finds they aren't as lifeless as might've been assumed! I'm guessing the objective is simply to get out alive but there is plenty of things to do on the way to that goal.

Master System Round-Up #6

As long-term visitors here (if there are any) might have noticed, I'm a bit of a Sega fan. It was their arcade games, specifically some of their Super Scaler titles, that got me into gaming to begin with, and their wonderful Master System console that so captivated me for years at home. With that in mind, and since I have now reviewed a sufficient number of the arcade versions of those Super Scaler gamers for a Round-Up, here is a look at their MS versions to see how they measure up:

Hang-On (1985)

I actually played this one before I'd even encountered it in an arcade since it came built into my MS, and I spent a lot of time with it. In fact, I got rather good and thought that would translate over to the arcade version when I did finally get to try it, only to fail miserably! It isn't a bad conversion though, all things considered (it was mainly the giant red bike that caused me problems in the arcades). There are four stages rather than the five in the original (happily, the cool night stage keeps its place) which repeat over and over so you basically keep going for as long as you can, and I used to be able to loop through the game several times. I can't now of course, as my powers have waned over the years, but it's still an enjoyable little racing game. It does get a little repetitive after a while - something a few more stages/backgrounds would've helped with, and some in-game music would've been nice too, but for most of us this was a freebie, and to me at least it was a very welcome one... 8/10 (arcade version reviewed here)

Film Round-Up #34

I suspect there aren't many film fans who don't enjoy seeing a good natural disaster unfold on the big screen. Well, maybe those snobby elitist film 'buffs' who sit around stroking their moustaches while musing over art-house film that don't make any sense while looking down on everyone else, but the rest of us? Yes please! They may not have multiple delicately interwoven plots, they may not (always) be scientifically accurate, sometimes they are total nonsense, but by jove they're good fun! Well, good ones can be. Here's a look at a few I watched recently:

Twister (1996)

There was a lot of hype around this one when it first came out and, like most, I duly watched it, but that was the only time I'd seen it until this feature, so it was like watching a new film. I thought it might've dated really badly if I'm honest, but it's actually still pretty good. It stars Helen Hunt and the late Bill Paxton as Jo and Bill, a married (but separated) couple who chase and research tornadoes along with their team (which includes a young Philip Seymour Hoffman). Naturally there are lots of tornadoes in the rural Oklahoma area in which the team (and an 'evil' rival team, obviously) have gathered and they plan to deploy a new gadget which will help them forecast future tornadoes. This of course involves lots of destruction and close-calls, and that in turn makes for an entertaining, action-packed film as you might imagine. Story and character-development are unsurprisingly light on the ground, but the extensive special effects still look good and the two leads are pretty convincing in their roles. Good fun in a switch-your-brain-off kind of way... 7/10

Top Five Psygnosis Arts

I have many happy memories of the various computer and/or game magazines I grew up reading but one of a handful of memories that stands out the most are those of the truly wonderful Psygnosis advertisements that adorned said magazines. They were most prevalent from the late 80s to early 90s and they were so eye-catching that to this day I still remember most of them while knowing little about the actual games they were advertising! This is mainly because most of them were for the Amiga and Atari ST which I didn't have, but I will remedy this in a series of posts in near (ish) future. In the meantime, here's a pick of some of the finest examples of their adverts from those glorious days. A gallery of them all will follow.

5. Barbarian (1987)

No, not that violent Barbarian game with Wolf and Maria Whittaker in the advert, although that was also memorable for different reasons (chortle!). The artwork for this Barbarian was, like many Psygnosis games, the work of talented British artist Roger Dean and, slightly oddly, places the warrior of the title only in the title logo thingy rather than in the actual scenario depicted in the art. The only creature there is a red dinosaur-type beastie which, as far as I know, doesn't feature in the game at any stage, but it's certainly a distinctive piece all the same. The game itself is a stabby platform adventure which casts the player in the expected role, but it has aged much less favourably than its lovely artwork thanks to some slow, sluggish gameplay that isn't helped by a 'unique', somewhat cumbersome control method. Look but don't touch!

Steam / GOG Downloads #8

SteamWorld Dig A Fistful of Dirt (2013)
By: Image & Form Genre: Platform/Arcade Adventure Players: 1 Difficulty: Easy-Medium
Featured Version: PC
Also Available For: PS4, Vita, Xbox One, Nintendo 3DS, Wii U, Switch

Anyone who visited my little page back around the turn of last year may recall a post I made wherein my good friend Luke had given me five game recommendations which I had then vowed to play before the end of the following year. Well, it took me over half of said year but I finally got around to playing the first of his choices, and it has taken me even longer to review it, but it was... SteamWorld Dig! It was among the more popular indie titles of its day so I'm definitely late to the party but due to such high praise from Luke I was keen to get stuck in. Near enough straight away, however, I found that it wasn't quite what I was expecting. I kind of had the impression it was a fairly standard platformer, just set underground. Maybe something like Spelunky. But it's actually more like a much slower-paced, somewhat more complicated Mr Driller. Well, kind of anyway.

Memorable Bosses #3

The Freaky Flower
Game: Wiz 'n' Liz

The first two bosses I chose for this feature are legendary in the world of games but this example is memorable to much fewer gamers, perhaps only me. It is, as its name suggests, a freaky flower, perhaps a mutant sunflower or something, and is the first boss you encounter when playing the excellent Wiz 'n' Liz, assuming the options were left as default. It doesn't really do much if I'm honest - there are no explosive seeds or scything leaves or anything like that; It doesn't actually fire anything at you. All it does do really is swing its head back and forth and occasionally run across the screen using its uprooted... umm, roots I guess. Oh, and it also looks grumpy, possibly due to how easy it is to defeat (which is very). I'm not really sure why I remember it so well if I'm honest. Maybe it's simply because I played the game a lot and therefore 'fought' the orange menace, wiping his filth from the land many times. Maybe it's just because it's a giant sunflower. All I know is, for whatever reason, this cursed creature was one of the first to pop into my head when conceiving this series of posts.

Click here for a full review of Wiz 'n' Liz, Mega Drive version.

Film Review #117

Birds of Prey (2020)
Director: Cathy Yan Starring: Margot Robbie, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Jurnee Smollett-Bell, Rosie Perez, Ewan McGregor, Chris Messina, Ella Jay Basco, Ali Wong

Certificate: 15 Running Time: 109 Minutes

Tagline: "Mind Over Mayhem"

Many moviegoers found DC's Suicide Squad to be rather whiffy, myself included, but with one exception - namely, Margot Robbie and her great performance as The Joker's main squeeze, Harley Quinn. Also like me, many were hoping to see more of her, but in a better film; perhaps a solo film where the focus would be (even more) on her. Happily, it didn't take long for just such a film to be announced. It may not have been called Harley Quinn: The Movie but the emphasis was without doubt on the loopy psychiatrist with the dazzling ass this time, although she wouldn't be on her own by any means. As even I know, the 'Birds of Prey' of the title are an all-female group of superheroes but, to my admittedly limited knowledge regarding the comicbook world, they don't count Ms. Quinn among their members, so I was a little confused as to the format this film would take. Birds vs Quinn, perhaps?

ColecoVision Games #1

Venture (1982)
By: Exidy Genre: Maze / Shooting Players: 1
Difficulty: Easy-Medium First Day Score: 173,800
Featured Version: ColecoVision
Also Available For: Arcade, VCS, Intellivision

I had intended to restrict all of my ColecoVision coverage here to 'Round Up' posts since the games in question are usually very simple and also invariably available on other systems too, but I was recently reminded of Venture while looking at t-shirts on the Redbubble website of all places. A short while playing it later and I decided that not only should I burble about it here but that it should even receive a proper review (not that I've gotten around to many Round Ups so far anyway!). Like many games of its day it first appeared in arcade form but the Coleco was the first system to see a home version, and it was apparently a launch title for the leathery company's spiffing new console too (voontle). I was too young to be among those first few lucky owners myself, but if I had been I suspect Venture would've taken up a lot of my time. Well, that's assuming my parents were kind enough to buy me the console and game, obviously. It was one of the more reasonably-priced consoles though!

PS4 Purchases #11

Secret of Mana by Square / Q Studios (2018)

I think it's likely I will always prefer the MegaDrive over the SNES but it's impossible to forget that the latter was home to some stunning games that never appeared on the MD. Among them was Secret of Mana which I have played since missing it in its day and its quality was quickly obvious. Then I saw it was the latest old classic to get the remake treatment and would even be getting a physical release for the PS4 and probably some other formats too. Fearing this version would be available in limited numbers and would quickly end up as expensive as so many others these days, I made the uncharacteristic move of pre-ordering it. That was two years ago and I still haven't played it as my OCD demands that I play the SNES version more thoroughly first. And as it turned out, this PS4 version has not gotten expensive at all. Oh well, least I still have it to look forward to (chortle!), and it does look really nice. The question is, does it lose any charm and character as a result of the new graphics? I know those qualities to be among those held in the highest regard as far as the original is concerned after all. Perhaps one day, when I've got a long white beard and two or three marbles rolling around upstairs, I'll find out...

First Celebrity Crushes?

I was talking to my good friend Luke recently, about Sandra Bullock as prompted by my recent post here as I recall, and he commented as he has before about my 'celebrity attractions' as he puts it. I think he finds it strange but nearly everyone has a celebrity crush or two, don't they? My wife predictably likes Pitt and DiCaprio and I've had certain favourites for many years now too.

The way people are these days I'm sure I would be called sexist or worse anyway, but it's not about tits and arse. Well, it's certainly not just about that. Personality and/or talent always come into play as well, for me at least. Anyway, my brief conversation with Luke got me thinking: who were my first celebrity crushes?

Puzzle Games #23

E-Motion a.k.a. Sphericule, a.k.a. The Game of Harmony (1990)
By: The Assembly Line Genre: Puzzle Players: 1 Difficulty: Medium
Featured Version: Amiga First Day Score: ???,???
Also Available For: Game Boy, PC, Atari ST, Commodore 64, Amstrad CPC, ZX Spectrum

You know how sometimes there are games you kept seeing screenshots of and kept seeing good review scores of, but they just didn't seem appealing? E-Motion is one of those games for me. It was pretty heavily advertised in its day and the few magazines I bought had pretty decent opinions of it. It just didn't look interesting to me so I never gave it a try. Then, however, many moons after its original release, I happened upon it on an Amiga and found that it's actually not bad. Imagine that! I can kind of still see why I wasn't enticed by it in its day though. Colourful it may be but it's still just screens of different coloured spheres. How much fun could that be? As it turned out, I'm not sure 'fun' is the most appropriate word for the game.

First Look PC #5

Inertial Drift: Sunset Prologue by PQube / Level 91 Entertainment (2020) - PC

How long has there been drifting in racing games? Was Daytona USA the first? However long it has been, one thing's for sure - pulling off a proper, respectable drift takes a lot of practise as it's pretty hard to do in most games. BUT WAIT! What if someone made a game specialising in drifting and made it simpler to actually perform the drifts? Well whoopdy dee and trolly bazoo, that sounds like a wonderful idea! Happily, a Northern Irish indie developer called Level 91 Entertainment has now done just that! Inertial Drift, without the 'Sunset Prologue' part, was launched in September of last year on Steam as well as for PS4 and Switch for around £15. However, if funds are tight and/or you aren't sure whether to take the chance on it, Level 91 have also been good enough to release this Sunset Prologue version which is basically just a fancy name for a free playable demo!

Film Round-Up #33

I might have grown up watching Sean Connery and Roger Moore save the world as Bond, and I was even around when Timothy Dalton gave it his best shot, but Pierce Brosnan was the first actor I can remember actually getting the part. He was cast in the mid-80s before Dalton but when he became unavailable Dalton was cast in his place. Many were keen to see the Irishman take on the role though, and his chance came when Dalton declined his third Bond film. Would he be worth the wait? And just as importantly, would his outings as the famous character be any good?

GoldenEye (1995)

Our first look at Brosnan Bond was a memorable one, featuring the famous Soviet chemical weapons facility escape followed by a huge dam bungee jump, and indeed, those pesky Russkies are the bad guys here, specifically the Janus crime syndicate who are aiming to take control of the 'GoldenEye' space-based weapon. These oafs are chiefly represented here by Ourumov (Gottfried John), a rogue Soviet general, Xenia Onatopp (Famke Janssen), a scary assassin who orgasms from killing people, Boris (Alan Cumming), a skilled programmer/hacker, and of course (spoiler!) Alec Trevelyan (Sean Bean), a former 00-agent who was presumed dead. It is the latter, with the help of his goons, who intends to use the GoldenEye's fancy electromagnetic pulse to devastate London and cause global financial meltdown.

Non-Speccy Homebrew Games #1

White Light (2017)
By: Sarah Walker Genre: Shooting Players: 1 Difficulty: Medium
Featured Version: BBC Micro First Day Score: 45,270
Also Available For: Nothing

Out of all the old 8-bit home micro computers that were popular here in the UK in the 80's, the good old Speccy definitely seems, to me at least, to be the one with the most active homebrew gaming scene. That's not to say the others have been totally abandoned though, as demonstrated by this title that was brought to my attention... I was going to say recently but it was actually a couple of years ago now, maybe even more. Oops! Oh well, I guess no one would ever accuse me of keeping up with the times, but it has remained in my thoughts and now I've finally gotten around to having a proper look at it. As you can probably see it's called White Light and it's a brand new shoot 'em up for the BBC Micro, and it comes to us on the back of a bewildering development time that has spanned nine years. By jingo, now that's a labour of love if I ever saw one! Was it worth the wait for those who knew about it?

Awesome Nature #23

Blue-Footed Booby
Type: Bird  Lives In: Eastern Pacific  Conservation Status: Least Concern

I guess it's not hard to work out why so many people have heard of this particular flapper (and no, it's not because of the blue feet)! It's quite an interesting creature though. They are much bigger than most people think, for one thing, reaching up to about 90cm with a wingspan of 1.5m. As might be obvious from its appearance, it's a marine bird, living in the Eastern Pacific from about Northern Mexico down to Peru, and only ventures onto land to breed, and that's what the bright blue feet are for. Only the males have them and they display them in a strange dance to attract a female. It must work too, as there are tons of them! I'm not sure why just the blue-booted variety is well known though, as there are several other types of booby (no, not making a joke about the more commonly-appreciated type of boobies!) including the more widespread red-footed booby. Oh, and in case you're wondering, the name comes from the Spanish word 'bobo' which means 'foolish', or 'clown' since they are clumsy on land!

Why It Is Awesome: Booby

Crap Games #13

Sword of Sodan (1990)
By: Innerprise / Electronic Arts Genre: Fighting Players: 1 Difficulty: Hard
Featured Version: Sega MegaDrive / Genesis First Day Score: 108,900 (including three pit deaths)
Also Available For: Amiga, Apple IIGS, Apple Mac

Is it me or does she look like Rebecca Romijn?

Back in the glorious days of Sega's mighty Mega Drive, EA weren't the soul-sucking, studio-destroying corporate leviathan that they are nowadays and they weren't yet flooding the shelves of used-game and charity shops with thousands of copies of their nearly-identical sports games. Much of what they released was pretty good, excellent even, and a forthcoming MD game of theirs was something to look forward to. Until Sword of Sodan came along. It was a conversion of an Amiga game from the year before which was well-received by magazines, so surely a version for the slightly-more-powerful Mega Drive would be more awesome than a unicycling panda? It was, however, slaughtered in reviews as though falling victim to the very weapon of its title, and it damaged EA's decent rep among MD owners as a result. Consequently, I never bothered with it. Was I wise?

The Best of Arcade Flyers - Part 1

Oh hey, what's going down? I'm sure I am not alone in my appreciation of game art. Back in my day when life made sense (kind of), that was usually in the form of adverts in the magazines of the time or the covers of the games themselves, but one major 'format' not covered by either of those is that of the sacred arcade, birth place and home of many of the most revered and loved games for generations.

For arcade games, these 'adverts' usually came in the form of flyers that were sent to arcades the world over to try and tempt said arcade's operator to bring in the game. Obviously, unless you were one of those owners, or at least knew one, these flyers went largely unseen. To that end, please join me in a celebratory tootle for this new series of Red Parsley posts which will feature what are in my opinion the finest flyers to grace... umm, paper I guess, or whatever they were printed on.

These posts will be by letter in alphabetical order. First up are games whose titles start with a number. There obviously wasn't much choice here so the selection isn't great (or plentiful) but I present it nonetheless. Greater things are to come...

Film Round-Up #32

Despite her acting talent, not to mention her undeniable aesthetic qualities, I hadn't really been much of a Sandra Bullock fan until recently. I'd seen a few films featuring her, sure, but I wasn't at the point where I would seek films out just because she was in them. Believe it or not, it was The Proposal that changed that, but I'm not really sure why (no, it wasn't her nude scene). Nonetheless, it did prompt me to watch some more films of hers for a Round-Up here. Some I'd seen before, others were new to me, but here are the ones I went for in this, the first of what will probably be two posts, maybe even three if you (or I?) are lucky!

Speed (1994)

This was, for those who had missed Demolition Man, the film that made many of us say "Crikey, who's that? What a hottie!" when first we laid eyes upon the lovely Ms. Bullock. The role that so enchanted us was that of Annie Porter, a passenger on the ill-fated bus that surely all of us know now so well? It's a film I had seen long ago but, while viewing it again for this post, there was a fair bit I had forgotten about, including the existence of some off-bus parts. Bullock features in all of them but the opening hostage scene that introduces Mr. Reeves as the courageous, risk-taking LAPD bomb disposal officer, Jack Traven, who ends up on the same speeding bus as Annie who, along with the rest of its passengers, is at the mercy of Dennis Hopper's mad bomber. All three stars are excellent in different ways but it's Bullock who stood out for many as the wrong-place-at-the-wrong-time passenger who is forced to take the wheel and somehow keep her cool while keeping the bus above 50mph through busy roads and, implausibly, over an unfinished section of an elevated freeway. Aside from that ridiculous stunt though, the film has aged splendidly... 8/10

Star Control - Part 11

Generally I need little excuse to burble on about the Star Control series - it is one of my favourite of all game series' after all, particularly the skillish second game - but I've already taken detailed looks at the various spacecraft, the story, and of course reviewed the actual game and its prequel, so what else is there? Why yes that's right, I could take a look at the many alien races themselves!

Seldom have I played a game with such a varied, eclectic roster of species, and while many are perhaps not terribly realistic or even a bit gimmicky (a bit like pro wrestling was around the same time, in fact), they are appealing and memorable all the same. There are quite a few as well though, so I'll split this into several parts. This is the second of two posts featuring the less-friendly half of the roster...

Spoiler Warning! - It's probably not really worth mentioning for a 25-year-old game but just in case - the following post will likely contain some small spoilers relating to Star Control 2 and the story found in its main game, so proceed with caution if you've yet to play through it! (assuming you plan to) :)

This is probably fan-made artwork so credit where it's due...

Sega Super Scaler Games #6

Thunder Blade (1987)
By: Sega Genre: Shooting Players: 1 Difficulty: Medium-Hard
Featured Version: Arcade First Day Score: 958,160
Also Available For: Mega Drive, Master System, PC Engine, X68000, Nintendo 3DS, Amiga, Atari ST, PC, MSX, Commodore 64, Amstrad CPC, ZX Spectrum

When you think about Super Scaler games, I'd wager most thoughts are immediately of Space Harrier, Out Run, or After Burner. There are many others of course, all of which should be featured here eventually, but of the major earlier releases, Thunder Blade seems to be one that has been rather forgotten in more modern times. Why could that be? It was well-received in its day after all, so why the lack of love these days? A Nintendo 3DS release aside, even Sega seem to have abandoned it to a degree. Has its choppery-shooting action aged worse than its brethren? Is it now as unpleasant as a gravel-filled burrito? This is a question your possibly-favourite herb-related blog was made to answer! Much of my time with the game was spent on my Speccy for which I had the magical +3 disk version but this review will, as always, focus on the original arcade version.

Memorable Adverts / Flyers #4

The Vindicator! by Imagine Software Ltd (1988) - Various Formats

Many of the magazine ads I remember from the likes of Sinclair User, C&VG, ACE and a plethora of similar publications of the 80s and early 90s were for big name arcade conversions or hyped titles for the home micros that everyone knew about and wanted to play, but a few less well-known games got distinctive adverts too. The Vindicator, it seems, is one of these. It seemed like a fairly big deal in its day but, despite having possibly-false links to big-name games (I've seen it called both Gryzor II and Green Beret II), there's barely any acknowledgement of it today. It doesn't even have a Wiki page!

Why is it memorable?
In the era of improbably-large and tough action movie heroes who could take down entire armies single-handedly, it featured a cool candidate for a game equivalent: a hulking great brute looking formidable, festooned in giant bullets for his equally huge gun, the twisted wreckage of a creature/craft of some sort lying behind him smouldering... He was even wearing shades for goodness sake! It was of course another classic piece of Bob Wakelin artwork, and like many others it elevated an otherwise rather ordinary game to the wanted lists of many young 8-bit gamers like myself (Amiga and ST owners were out of luck - this one was just for us Speccy, CPC, and C64 gamers!).

TV Shows #22 - Part 1

The Boys Season One (2019)
Developed By: Eric Kripke
Starring: Karl Urban, Jack Quaid, Antony Starr, Erin Moriarty, Dominique McElligott, Elisabeth Shue, Jessie T. Usher, Laz Alonso, Chace Crawford, Tomer Kapon, Karen Fukuhara, Nathan Mitchell

Certificate: 18 Running Time: 55-66 Minutes per Episode, 8 Episodes

Tagline: "Never Meet Your Heroes"

One of the positives (or indeed negatives depending on how you feel about the subject) of the enormous popularity of TV/film comic-book adaptations over recent years is the vast range of source material that can and is being plundered for our viewing pleasure, including some that many of us probably hadn't even heard of before. The Boys is a great example of this. I certainly didn't know of it until Amazon unveiled it as the latest of their 'originals'. It is a fairly recent example though. Originally created in comic form by Garth Ennis and Darick Robertson and released between 2006 and 2012, it's set in the real world (mainly the US) and is, as far as I know, the first realistic look at what a world with superheroes might really be like. The result wasn't remotely surprising either, considering what our society has become.

Retro Gaming Zoo #4

Humans are stupid. Animals are always better than stupid humans, everyone knows that, and it's something that's also true in the world of video games. A tremendous variety of weird and wonderful animals have starred in games over the years and here I'll be taking a closer look at some of them. Next up is:

Creature #4 - Alestes of Agony
Type of Creature? Owl  Realistic Portrayal? Kind of, yes

By the early-90s, animal characters were firmly established in the world of videogames, often taking the starring role, but most of these were found in platform or general action games. There had of course been a shoot 'em up example or two but they were few and far between. One, however, that pretty much everyone remembers, here in the UK at least, is Agony. Not only was it from Psygnosis in the days of their gorgeous, distinctive game artwork, but the animal it featured was also a glorious, majestic barn owl. Alestes, as it turned out (if you read the accompanying blurb) was a student wizard who had been transformed into a barn owl, but it mattered not to those who played it - we were in control of a beautifully-animated flapper, swooshing through moody locales and taking out horrifying beasties with his echolocation waves. Now, I can't say for sure how destructive real owl echolocation waves are, and I'm confident they can't be powered-up, but aside from that uncertainty (and the fact that he used to be a human), Alestes does appear to be not only a graceful game character, especially for a shoot em up, but also a pretty accurately-portrayed one.

Is His Game Any Good? Indeed it is. To be honest, it was always a game I expected to be more style than substance, and I suppose it is, but contrary to what is often the norm in those circumstances, it doesn't make it a bad game. Aside from its visuals, it didn't break any new ground, admittedly, but it was a cracking game for its time and is still very enjoyable now. Check the full review here.

F-Zero - Extinct?

Many moons have passed since last I wrote about the F-Zero series but it has rarely strayed far from my thoughts. Featuring most often among these thoughts is my desire to see a brand new F-Zero game. It has been some 16 years now since the last one - Climax for the Game Boy Advance - and despite ample opportunities for sequels on the Wii, WiiU, DS/3DS or Switch, there hasn't been so much as a whisper.

This continues to be a great source of sorrow for me, not to mention confusion, but never have I sought an explanation for what must be considered a significant oversight on Nintendo's part. According to my subsequent research however, the answer only serves to confuse me even more. The great Shigeru Miyamoto has reportedly said that they stopped producing new F-Zero games because there was little new they could add to the series. This, combined with the fact that other developers started releasing their own futuristic racers, meant that Nintendo didn't want to make any new F-Zero titles unless they could find something new to bring to the table, but they couldn't so they stopped. Now, I can understand Nintendo's, particularly Miyamoto's desire to be innovative - that's basically what Nintendo have always been about, certainly in terms of hardware - but most developers' idea of innovation or progression in a game series is simply to release a sequel/reboot for the latest hardware that takes advantage of the new system's abilities. Why couldn't Nintendo do that for their own systems?

Wonder Boy Series - Part 3

Wonder Boy (1987)
By: Westone / Sega Genre: Platform / Action Players: 1 Difficulty: Medium
Featured Version: Sega Master System First Day Score: ??,???
Also Available For: Arcade, SG-1000, Game Gear, Atari ST, Commodore 64, Amstrad CPC, ZX Spectrum
Download For: Wii Virtual Console, Sony PSN

Yes I know, I've already reviewed the original Wonder Boy game, but though it may have originated in the arcades, to me, my good friend Luke, and probably many others, it has always been a Master System game first and foremost. This may be because it featured prominently in the MS's somewhat limited early selection of games, but it may also be because it's a rather stonking conversion! Well, I always used to think so anyway, but to my sorrow I haven't played it for many moons now. I didn't play it all that much even then if I'm honest. The reasons for this are also the reasons the original game won't quite receive a top score here at Red Parsley; namely, that I became distracted by the sequels Monster Land and Dragon's Trap - which were even better! I still had a lot of fun with this game though - let's see if it's still as good...

Film Round-Up #31

The Fallen Series (2013 - 2019)
Directed By: Antoine Fuqua, Babak Najafi, Ric Roman WaughStarring: Gerard Butler, Morgan Freeman, Aaron Eckhart, Radha Mitchell, Piper Perabo, Melissa Leo, Robert Forster, Angela Bassett, Sean O'Bryan, Jada Pinkett Smith, Lance Reddick, Tim Blake Nelson, Nick Nolte, Danny Huston

Certificate: 15 Running Time: Approx 339 minutes (so far)

Despite having a fairly appealing premise, it has taken me a startling (though I suppose not too surprising) amount of time to get around to watching the reasonably-well-heralded Olympus Has Fallen - all the more odd since I generally enjoy so-called 'mindless' action films. I have of course since discovered that it's the first in what soon became an entire franchise, with two movie sequels already made, several more planned, and a TV show on the way too. The films already released have of course been publicly shunned by movie snobs, as many action films and/or big-budget blockbusters are (though I suspect many of them secretly enjoy them). I, however, watch films simply to be entertained, and since action films can entertain just as well as more cerebral dramas, perhaps more so depending on your mood, I have no problem with publicly stating my fondness for them. So, despite the frankly unexplainable delay, I was looking forward to seeing these...

Neo Geo Round-Up #1

I've never really been the biggest fan of one-on-one fighting games, I'm sorry to say. I did get drawn in by the Street Fighter II craze like most gamers around that time, but aside from that game and a few other Capcom examples, it's a genre I haven't spent too much time on. This may be because I'm not that good at them. Learning the often-complicated special move commands and performing elaborate combos can be very satisfying but I'm not one of those gamers that it comes naturally to.

Mainly for this reason, most of the examples found on the Neo Geo have been largely neglected here in RKS Land. In an effort to rectify that, however, I have decided to take a look at each fighting game series found on SNK's mighty console in the form of round-ups. I can't promise they will be the most comprehensive evaluations as the finer points of such games are often lost on me, but I shall do my best. These posts, much like all of my posts, are more for my benefit than yours anyway, assuming anyone is even reading this, as they motivate me to play games I've seldom or never played before, but I do of course hope you like them! First up was going to be the Fatal Fury series which was, I believe, the first SNK fighting game series, but there are about a million of them. So instead, I've started with one I'm at least a little familiar with - the Art of Fighting series. Before I get started, however, here's a bit of general info on the series.

PS4 Purchases #10

I suddenly realised today that I haven't done one of these PS4 posts for a while, and while deciding which of my backlog of games to feature, I was startled to discover that I haven't mentioned these two games yet despite having them in my collection for over two years now. Oops! Oddly, I actually have them both twice too. This is because I had them on my Christmas wishlist on Amazon, but when I didn't receive them as gifts I decided to buy them for myself. Then, however, it turned out my sister, who I hadn't seen over Christmas, had got them for me. Harumpf! Oh well, here's a look at both games (well, one copy of each anyway - chortle!).

Cat Quest by The Gentlebros/PQube (2017)

Unlike most of my PS4 games, this one was introduced to me thanks to the free demo I found on the PlayStation Store. I'm not usually much of an RPG gamer but I was quickly enchanted by its casual, humorous tone (including many cat-astrophically bad cat puns - har har!), and as soon as I finished the demo I sought out the full version. Happily, a physical version was available, and for a very reasonable price on Amazon too, and upon receiving it I got stuck in with an enthusiasm I seldom have for any game these days. In fact, I played it so much I should've written a full review by now - soon, perhaps - but suffice to say, this entertaining adventure is still one of my favourite PS4 games despite being one of my first. Sadly it isn't one of those indie releases with an instruction booklet or other goodies in the case, or even a leaflet, but it doesn't matter too much when the game is as much fun as this one. I would say it's one I'll spend a lot of time on but I already have!

Film Review #116

Ammonite (2020)
Director: Francis Lee Starring: Kate Winslet, Saoirse Ronan, Gemma Jones, James McArdle, Alec Secăreanu, Fiona Shaw

Certificate: 15 Running Time: 120 Minutes

The last year has been a lean time for movie fans. This is of course understandable given the rather unique circumstances, but lean nonetheless, with many films I was looking forward to being delayed considerably. Some, like Black Widow and The French Dispatch still aren't out, while others have seen low-key releases on streaming services or very limited theatrical releases. Ammonite is one of these, and while it has only been released in the US so far, I'm happy to say I have now finally managed to see it anyway. I can't even remember what put it on my radar now. It definitely wasn't the much vaunted 'intimate' scenes between the two female leads (*cough*cough*) so what could it have been? It was could well have been simply down to Saoirse Ronan's presence here, having been something of a fan of hers since Hanna, but it's rarely less than interesting to see a biopic of an important historical figure. In this case it's Mary Anning (Winslet), the 19th-century British palaeontologist, but as my wife (who had also been looking forward to seeing it) and I sson discovered, it's not exactly a biopic at all.

Arcade Shmups #27

1942 (1984)
By: Capcom Genre: Shooting Players: 1-2 (alternate) Difficulty: Medium-Hard
Featured Version: Arcade First Day Score: 62,520 (one credit)
Also Available For: NES, Game Boy Color, PC-88, Fujitsu FM-7, Sharp X1, MSX, Commodore 64, Amstrad CPC, ZX Spectrum

Capcom have been responsible for some truly wonderful games over these long years but one series that seems to be somewhat overlooked nowadays is the 19XX shooter series. It isn't even one of the 13 series mentioned in the company's summary on Wikipedia! What has the series done to deserve such scorn? Does it suck ass? I doubt that, but in order to find out I will play through the entire series starting with this original which graced arcades long before their mighty CPS boards were introduced. It is therefore a simple enough game as you might expect. Rather surprisingly for a Japanese-developed game, however, it sees you on the side of the Americans against the entire Japanese Air Force!