Astronomical Musings #1

I recently read a news report on a subject that I've long found slightly irksome - extrasolar planets. They, for non-astronomers, are planets in orbit around stars that are not our Sun. They are difficult to spot - considering their distance it's hardly surprising - and it's only been with the help of recent innovations in the field that astronomers have been reliably able to detect them amidst the glare of their parent star. As the news article in question mentions, this is done by looking out for the tiny and very brief drop in luminescence in the star as the planet passes between it and us.

The existence of quite a large number of these planets has now been confirmed. Amazingly, from such a huge distance it's possible to determine what kind of planet they are and even their temperature. Many of those found so far are gas giants but this latest discovery is not. Not only is it a terrestrial planet (i.e. one with a solid surface) but it's also one that's supposedly in the so-called 'habitable zone' around its host star. By this the genius astrophysicists mean that its distance from its star and therefore its mean surface temperature is comparable to that of Earth. This had led to many excited claims of 'a second Earth' or a 'twin' of our planet which has in turn prompted some more imaginative individuals to speculate that it might even host complex life-forms not unlike those found here on our own planet, and it's from here that my problem arises.

It was the otherwise outstanding BBC astronomy series called 'The Planets' that first brought this trend to my attention. There's one episode where they consider and then rule out the possibility of life on the various planets and moons in our own solar system. Their reasons for this are familiar ones - "Life couldn't exist on Venus, it's too hot" ... "Life couldn't exist on Jupiter, it's a gas giant" ... "Life couldn't exist on Titan, it's too cold" ... "Life couldn't exist on Mars, there's no oxygen or water" ... etc, etc, etc. Am I the only one who finds this kind of thing annoying? What they're basically saying is: life from Earth couldn't exist in these places. Is it not beyond the realms of possibility to think that possible life elsewhere in the galaxy might take other forms? Is it not incredibly arrogant to assume that, if life does exist beyond Earth, it must still be formed from the same basic ingredients as ours?

I can understand that we only have one example of a planet with life from which to take reference, so our search should probably begin there, but our kind of life might comprise only a very small proportion of all life in the universe for all we know. We could even be unique. Does it make sense to immediately dismiss a planet because it doesn't have an oxygen/nitrogen atmosphere, or because it doesn't have an abundant water source, or because it doesn't have a thick atmosphere to protect the surface from radiation? These things might be poisonous to some life-forms as many gases and liquids are to us and the same goes for temperatures. There are even examples here on Earth of life-forms who do not necessarily need the things we assume aliens will. Creatures that spend their whole lives in deep caves devoid of any light, for example, or life-forms that thrive on our ocean floors beneath crushing water pressures, living in the intense heat from volcanic vents. There are even creatures that can survive exposure to intense nuclear radiation. Surely this provides a hint of just how adaptable life can be?

I suppose one possible downside of looking for life in seemingly unlikely places is that we simply won't know what we're looking for. There could be complex being living in the clouds of Jupiter for all we know - how could we tell? I suppose I've answered my own question really but I still find it very frustrating that we only seem to have any interest in planets or moons which share some qualities with our own planet. Are the boffins being narrow-minded or have I just been watching too much Star Trek?

NES Platform Games #2

Mighty Bomb Jack (1986)
By: Tecmo Genre: Platform Players: 1 Difficulty: Medium
Featured Version: Nintendo NES First Day Score: 170,350
Also Available For: Amiga, Atari ST, Commodore 64, Amstrad CPC
Download For: Wii Virtual Console

One of my favourite arcade games when I was growing up was Bomb Jack. Its simple premise and pixel-perfect controls made for a tense and addictive game. During my Speccy gaming days I noticed that Elite had quietly slipped out a sequel on the 8-bit micros of the time which, as it turned out, was a pretty big departure from the first game and wasn't nearly as enjoyable. However, it seems that there was another sequel shortly before the one I played all those years ago, known as Mighty Bomb Jack. It was released on the NES as well as most home micros of the time, but not the Speccy or any Sega system which is probably why I didn't hear about it at the time! As is often the case here at Red Parsley, however, it's now time to rectify that. That usually begins with some brief research before actually playing the game and on this occasion I was shocked to find a game that is apparently despised amongst the NES community. It can't be that bad, surely?

We'll find that out a bit later but I have to admit - my expectations weren't good, even before I discovered some of the vitriolic reviews doing the rounds. Obscure sequels to all-time classic coin-ops hardly have a good track-record after all! Then again, it is by the developer of the original so all hope was not lost. There's some poor excuse of a story involving Jack's mission to rescue a royal family from the clutches of 'king demon', Belzebut (no, that's not a typo). This, unsurprisingly, involves travelling through many bomb-filled stages! There are sixteen levels altogether (not counting the final battle) and each of them is split into two parts. The second part of each, known as 'Royal Palace' rooms, will be most familiar to Bomb Jack fans as they are basically stages from the first game. In other words, they're single-screen stages filled with platforms, bombs to collect, and enemies to avoid, but this time without the fancy backgrounds. The first parts of each level, however, are rather different.

For the only time in a Bomb Jack game as far as I know, the main parts of each level take the form of scrolling platform stages. The basic premise remains the same as before though, and that is to collect the bombs in each stage, but this time it's not mandatory. Given the considerably larger size of the stages, the bombs are more sparsely spread out and the platforms are more infrequent, but the same kind of enemies spontaneously (and randomly) appear as always, often following you around. The notable addition to these sections are the numerous treasure chests dotted around almost as liberally as the bombs. These can be opened by Jack if he jumps while stood on one and they contain a variety of items including bonus points of various values, extra lives, Mighty Drinks, and Mighty Coins. Each stage, both 'Action Zones' and 'Royal Palace' rooms, are timed and each Mighty Drink you collect will give you an extra ten seconds. The Mighty Coins, however, are a little more interesting.

Once used, these special coins will change Jack's colour and bestow new abilities on him. Using one coin will turn him blue which allows him to open otherwise-locked orange treasure chests (the normal ones are red - they actually look almost identical though!), using two coins turns him orange and allows him to open any treasure chest simply by walking into it, and using three coins turns him green and has the same effect as collecting a Power Ball - it turns all enemies on-screen into coins (of a non-Mighty variety). Talking of the Power Balls, these also appear elsewhere in the stages. They, and the 'B' icons, return as normal in the Royal Palace rooms but in the main stages they will only appear from treasure chests, in addition to its normal item, when you've collected a sufficient number of bombs. Collecting the items in the treasure chests must be done carefully though as if you collect too many, an unpleasant surprise awaits!

If you collect too many Mighty Drinks or Coins, the game judges you as being too greedy and sends you to a Torture Room! These are like Royal Palace Rooms but without any bombs. To escape from them you instead have to perform fifty jumps! On top of these new features, there's also quite a few secrets to be discovered here too including secret rooms with treasure chests (and enemies which can still kill you!), and it's also possible to skip all but the first of the main stages and just play through the Royal Palace rooms instead. This leads to the 'bad' ending though so you'll have to keep plugging away if you want to see the proper ending which requires two special crystal balls, which are of course hidden! It's a very tough game too, even unfairly so in some ways. For example, if you lose a life you have to restart a whole stage from scratch, and this is also the case if you manage to leave a Torture Room as well - back to the start with all power-ups lost!

As with the original game, the random and sudden appearance of the enemies can also cause problems if they materialise close to (or right on top of) Jack since he dies from the merest touch, and then of course it's back to the start of the stage. If you can cope with the need to complete each stage in one life though, there's a lot of enjoyment to be had here. The sights and sounds are a bit basic though. The sprites are quite good and well detailed but the backgrounds and foregrounds mostly consist of simple patterns repeated through the stage, albeit in alternating colours which are well-chosen. The music and effects are similarly simplistic but pleasant and inoffensive enough. As with the original game though, it's the superb accuracy of control over Jack that makes the game so enjoyable. He can jump any height you want, including the whole height of the screen, and can hover or change direction at a pixel's notice, and he's extremely nippy too, so it's possible to zip all over the place, weaving in and out of the pesky enemies with as much precision as you yourself can muster.

While it would be hard to place this game alongside the best platformers on the NES, mainly because there is so many great ones, it's still an addictive and entertaining game which is far better than I was expecting after seeing the savage reviews it received elsewhere. It can be rather harsh and unfair for sure but, like the original game, the controls and collision-detection are spot-on so practise makes perfect! It's packed with secrets and areas to explore too, and some areas have more than one route through them, so it'll certainly keep you busy. Bomb Jack is deservedly regarded as an all-time great and Bomb Jack Twin is basically the original on steroids but Mighty Bomb Jack is a far better sequel than Bomb Jack II. Rather than changing the style altogether it instead expands upon it, keeping the core gameplay and adding a good amount of new stuff too. I'm not sure which game those other reviewers were playing but this reviewer thinks Mighty Bomb Jack is great, and I'm confident that fans of the original game would agree!

RKS Score: 8/10

Merry Christmas!

So, for the second year it's Christmas time here at Red Parsley, and indeed everywhere else that celebrates it! Unlike last year I'm not at home in the UK but am instead enjoying a sweltering festive season in Brazil right in the middle of their summer so it's been a mixture of searing temperatures, monsoon-like downpours, and brick-shaking thunderstorms. This of course means it doesn't really seem like Christmas to someone brought up not too far below the Arctic Circle. I'm lucky enough, however, to have a great family who arranged a special early Christmas for me before I left the UK so whatever happens here over the next week or so is a bonus!

This also means I will be doing virtually no gaming, retro or otherwise, during this most celebrated of festivals, but I suspect many of you will be. Of course, this is likely to be stupid modern games that take an hour to install, two hours to download updates, and are still riddled with bugs, but I'll leave you to it! I'll be back to super retro-gaming before long and, unlike last year, I've actually had a few posts saved up this time too. Regardless of my pursuits here or at home though, I hope very much that you all enjoy whatever you spend your time on and that you have a lot of fun. I've made some great new friends here over the last year including Sean, Bryan, Eric, Pablo, Marco, some older friends have continued to drop by including Marc, Edward, and Darkstalker, and there are of course many others too, so it just stands to me to wish you all, as well as everyone else who stops by here, and most of all my wonderful wife:

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Awesome Nature #7

Great Kiskadee
Type: Bird Lives In: Central and South America Conservation Status: Least Concern

It's tempting whilst on holiday here in Brazil to do an 'Awesome Nature' post about one of the more famous creatures or trees found here but one thing I always look forward to when coming here is the sound of the Great Kiskadee's. They're not an especially tropical bird in any regard though. Even with their eye-catching white head-stripe, the brown and yellow colour means they wouldn't look out of place in any of the woodland areas back in the UK, and they don't exhibit any unusual behaviour as a result of their surroundings aside from their bravery in chasing off much larger birds. It's mostly just that loud and distinctive call that makes them stand out and it's a call that can be heard almost anywhere in Brazil, pretty much endlessly! It's also a call that led to their name here - Bem-Te-Vi, which translates to "I see you well!" They might see us but it's not to easy to spot them, only hear them. Everywhere.

Why It Is Awesome: Because it never shuts up!

Listen to their 'song' on Wikipedia or just play this clip:

Gaming Memories - Part 7

It was my discovery of the mighty OutRun in the arcades of Torquay that first brought the Sega name to my attention and my subsequent acquisition of their splendid Master System console endeared them to me further, but it was when the MegaDrive arrived on the scene that I truly became ensnared by their magnificence, twenty long years ago now.

It must've been around 1988 when I got my Master System. I quickly became very fond of it and remain so today but it was never a console that was gifted by a huge range of titles. There was enough to support a monthly magazine though which was simply called 'S'. Although this magazine went on to become better known as Sega Power and would last right up until the end of the Saturn's reign, in the late 80's it was a pretty small magazine, composed of few pages, but midway through its run it started featuring news of a new and very exciting-sounding console. My interest was piqued immediately but I grew more and more excited the more they featured news and even some tantalising screenshots of some of the games the privileged few could expect to play on this new wonder-machine! The excitement and anticipation grew day by day, for my good friend Luke too. Then, one weekend I dropped by a different friend's house for the first time in a while, only to be greeted by a sight of special magnificence - a gleaming new imported Japanese MegaDrive! The sight of this was quite overwhelming in itself and the expectation increased when he flipped the power switch to the 'on' position.

I didn't know which game was 'slotted' into the shiny console, it didn't matter. The 'Sega' logo appeared on the screen in a new and exciting way. The screen flashed .... a figure jumped up out of sight, a shurikin flashed across the screen accompanied by a sound effect, another followed it .... EXPLOSION!! Lightning ripped across the sky. A sword appeared. It expertly deflected the shurikins. The person holding the sword is seen .... It is Joe Musashi - master ninja! All this while amazing music coincides perfectly with the action. The title appears: The Super Shinobi! It was unlike anything that had ever gone before it - even outdoing most arcade games of the time, and nothing from the actual game had yet been seen!

The events of this day remain the most a new console has impressed me upon seeing it for the first time. My friend and his brother had some other imported games as well but none were quite as dazzling as this first one. A few months went by and the MegaDrive has finally been launched here in the UK so my friend decided to switch his Japanese console for an official PAL one. Until, that is, he discovered that it ran slightly slower than a Japanese machine so he decided to sell it and return to his imported one again. This was shortly before Christmas so I seized the opportunity to take it off his hands by 'suggesting' to my parents that it would make an ideal Christmas present for me, and to my not-inconsiderable delight - they agreed! It was then a long wait until Christmas morning of course, but when it did arrive it was a moment to behold. I played each game as I unwrapped them and can remember phoning my good friend (and fellow MD-admirer), Luke, so he could hear the awesome music as I played! Ah, what a great day that was, and the beginning of a long relationship that still holds up today. My friend and his brother had bought five games for their UK MD before reverting to its Japanese forebear and they were:

Altered Beast (1988)

Remember when consoles used to come bundled with a game? It was a great idea and this is the one that Sega chose to accompany their fancy new console, to start with at least. It was a bit of a strange choice though. I guess it was only natural to choose a conversion of one of their own arcade games but wouldn't a popular one have been a better choice? Not only was Altered Beast a little unloved but it also did little to demonstrate the splendid abilities of Sega's latest machine - it was near-enough arcade perfect but the coin-op was hardly the flashiest one around to start with. Not only that but the Master System already had a reasonable version of the game itself! Surely the idea was to show everyone that the MD could do things the MS could only dream of? Instead, it showed us that the MD could do something the MS had already done, just slightly better...

Revenge of Shinobi (1989)

This, however, is the kind of game Sega should've bundled with it. As mentioned, it was the first MD game I ever saw in action and it had quite an effect on me - a true 'gaming memory' in itself! It wasn't just all flashy intros either. The soundtrack by Yuzo Koshiro and amazing graphics were indeed stunning but they merely complemented what was an amazingly-well-designed run 'n' gun-style adventure rather than diverting attention from any flaws. It was a big game, with nearly every one of the side-scrolling stages having a unique feature, and was packed with the kind of attention to detail that I couldn't have imagined mere months earlier whilst at the same time staying true to the game's roots and continuing the evolution of the series, and arguably the whole genre. Everything a launch game (and a sequel) should be and still a fantastically playable game today. (full review here)

Thunder Force 2 (1989)

Long since eclipsed by the much more famous and revered sequels that would go on to reign supreme at the head of the genre on the MD, this creative blaster was an unfairly-overlooked game in the MD's early days but was actually a top game in my opinion, and made for another great launch title too. The graphics were neat, colourful and varied and the music and sound effects were superb. The alternating stage styles made for a nicely varied and challenging game too - the overhead, multi-directional stages from the original Thunder Force were expanded upon but Techno Soft also added an (almost) equal number of more traditional side-scrolling stages with bosses and all the usual stuff. One of my favourite things about the Thunder Force series has always been its weapon system and here's where is started, and since this game marked the last appearance of the overhead sections, some weapons were never seen again. A great shooter which I still play regularly today. (full review here)

Mystic Defender (1989)

I always remember seeing this game reviewed under its Japanese name of Kujaku Ō 2 and it was this enduring memory that led me, many years later, to discover that it's actually the sequel to one of my favourite MS games - Spellcaster! The first game was an arcade adventure with some RPG overtones but this game was very much of the platform/run 'n' gun variety featuring a nimble character who could collect and use a variety of magics over the large and atmospheric game-world. It's a bit like a mystical, ogre-filled version of Revenge of Shinobi or, as I recall a magazine of the day cruelly putting it, "a poor-man's Ghouls 'n' Ghosts". Whatever you want to compare it to, it's an underrated and enjoyable adventure if you ask me, and one I was pleased to have as one of the earliest parts of my MD collection.

Golden Axe (1989)

Here we had another game that was already available for the MS. Crucially, however, this time it was both a significant improvement over that already-good version, and it was a mighty fine game to start with! The MS tried its best but had to drop the selectable characters and the two-player mode as well as losing a lot of audio/visual quality. This skillish MD version actually improved on the arcade version! The graphics were as detailed but more colourful, the music was superb, plus it even added a whole new stage as well as a couple of new play modes, one of which was a more like a one-on-one fighting game! Golden Axe is a great game in my opinion and this MD conversion was one of the first 'better-than-arcade' ones I can ever remember seeing. It would've also made a fantastic pack-in game for the console too, especially if Sega had thought to include a second controller.


So there we have it - my first five MegaDrive games but certainly not my last. Sega's 16-bit wonder would go on to dominate my free time over the coming months, cause some arguments with fellow games, solve some others, and even now is still by far the console I've spent the most time on. At my peak I had around 70-80 games for it and, unlike some consoles I would go on to own, all the games were played thoroughly. It's also a console that's aged extremely well in my view - many of its games are as playable now as they were the day they came out and that must surely be a testament to Sega's awesomeness when they were at their absolute best!

Top Five Spectrum Shmups

There's no question that over my many years of gaming, shoot 'em ups have become one of my favourite genres, probably my very favourite, but it wasn't always the case. Back when my main source of gaming was my Speccy, I didn't spend much time playing them. Is that because the humble Speccy was incapable of hosting a decent shmup? No, I don't think so - it was graced by more than a few top arcade conversions such as ace ports of Flying Shark, R-Type, and Salamander so that can't be it. Maybe there wasn't many available or perhaps I just failed to notice them. Whatever the reason, it's a subject I've recently looked into and decided to compile a list of the best ones, excluding arcade conversions. Here's my cyan-soaked choices:

Games-Related Top Fives Disclaimer: I've traditionally stuck to the games I know and love so far, and these game-related top fives reflect that. One of the purposes of this blog is diversify my gaming experiences, to play games I haven't played before, so I will do new game-related top fives in a few years to see how different they are!

5. Xenon (1988)

Whilst I knew the 8-bit micros received ports of this overhead shooter, I've always been under the impression that the ST and Amiga versions were its natural home. But then I recently heard that supposedly the Speccy version is the best one, and playing it reveals that it is indeed pretty sweet! The game itself is something of an acquired taste - you can switch between a flying spacecraft, for which the screen scrolls automatically, and a ground-based tank which can move as quickly or as slowly as you like, and there are of course enemies that can only be destroyed by one or the other of them. The monochrome graphics on this version can be a little confusing at times but other than that, it's a great effort, and the 128k version has some fantastic music too!

4. Zynaps (1986)

I actually first played this horizontal-scroller on my Amiga and I didn't really think too much of it at the time. It was okay, just rather basic and far too hard! I often heard positive things about the Speccy version though and sure enough, like Xenon, it's actually more enjoyable than its 16-bit interpretation! Its basic nature suits the Speccy more than the Miggy and it's also noticeably easier, mercifully. That's not to suggest it's now an easy game, mind you, but it is more forgiving and I enjoyed playing it a lot as a result. The backgrounds are a bit bare but the sprites and foreground graphics are detailed and colourful, particularly later in the game, so it's worth the tough slog. There's a few power-ups to make things a little easier too. Just goes to show, more powerful machines don't necessarily produce the best versions of a game!

3. Cybernoid (1988)

This side-viewed, flick-screen effort was one of the most famous and celebrated of all Speccy shmups and it's easy to see why. The premise was no more interesting than any other game of the type - you have to retrieve jewels and supplies stolen by pirates - but, as was typical of Raffaele Cecco's games, it was one of the best looking games to appear on Sir Clive's machine. The glorious, multi-coloured screens were full of detail and populated by lots of equally-colourful enemies which exploded satisfyingly in a nice, sparkly fashion when you shot them. The screens were also packed with just as many obstacles and traps as they were evil aliens and there was numerous power-ups too. Cybernoid is a unique and addictive game but it's also bloody hard which is probably the only thing keeping it from the number one spot!

2. Chronos (1987)

This is actually one of the few shmups I did spend a lot of time playing all those years ago and amazingly it's a mere budget game! It's often criticised for its simplicity - there are no power-ups and few different types of alien for example, and some of those that do exist are merely geometric shapes - but on this occasion simplicity is a good thing in my opinion. The few sound effects are good ones and the graphics are detailed with nicely-chosen monochrome colour schemes, but my favourite thing about the game is the design of the stages which is quite unlike any other shoot 'em up I've played. The horizontally-scrolling scenery is quite extensive and features several types of barrier as well as narrow gaps, multiple routes, and even written messages. I don't think it was even particularly well-liked, either by reviewers or other gamers, but the sheer unpredictability of the stages was enough to keep me playing and it's challenging and enjoyable throughout as well.

1. Lightforce (1986)

This one was seemingly a rather high-profile game being the first release on Gargoyle's 'Faster Than Light' label, and what a debut it was! It's a vertical-scroller this time which is set over five stages which take place in space and over the surface of planets and it's a game that was notable for its lovely colourful graphics and big sprites which feature none of the colour-clash that so blights many other games of the same... ummm... colourfullness. There's nothing especially original here admittedly - travel up the screen in your oddly-designed vessel and blast everything that moves - but it's the way that it's done that impresses. The sound is very limited but those lovely graphics and slick gameplay will encourage you to keep blasting away until you sent the alien scum running for good!

Holiday Time!

Well, it's been around twenty months since I started this blog at the behest of my videogame-hating wife who was tired of listening to me babble on about them. I guess she hoped it would channel my interest in the subject in a more creative direction. I don't know how any of my regular readers feel but I'd like to think it's been fairly successful. At the very least, it's forced me to expand my gaming horizons beyond the few consoles I've owned in the past and play some games I've been hearing about for 20-30 years! For the first time since Red Parsley's birth, however, I am going on holiday!

Yes that's right, even as some of you are reading this very post I may be somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean, for RKS is taking a well-earned break in Brazil for... one month! I've been to Brazil three times before so I know I'll have a supremely enjoyable and leisurely time, plus it's the summer there at the moment too which means it will be very hot but with a lot of tropical rain storms, and believe me - it can rain in Brazil and then some! My travels this time will take in my wife's home town, Brasilia, where we will spend Christmas with her family, before moving on to Sao Paulo (and possibly Santos) for our New Year celebrations with her friends. This overwhelmingly huge city is home to many unique and diverse areas and one of them is Liberdade, its Japanese neighbourhood where I will hopefully encounter the same anime and ninja weapon stores that I saw on my first visit!

One thing that did disappoint me, just a little, two years ago when I was last in Sao Paulo, and something that's loosely associated with the bulk of the subject-matter of this blog, was the lack of anything remotely associated with retro gaming. Considering Brazil's supposed retro-gaming heritage, this was a big surprise to me. We are talking about the country that supported many consoles for far longer than anyone else, after all. Take my beloved Master System for example, which saw new releases here right up until 1998 when I was preparing myself for the Dreamcast's launch. Brazil, like some Far-Eastern countries, has also seen the release of many 'clone' consoles and 'unofficial' games too, so I hope this time I'm able to find some treasure-troves of retro goodness. If I'm successful, you'll read about it here, I'm sure!

Of course, this kind of thing is hardly the reason for my visit though, and regardless of whether or not I find any little retro nuggets, I'm sure the trip will be a fantastic one. I'll still be posting things here every few days but before anyone starts calling me a sad bastard for writing blog posts about retro games while I'm on holiday in a tropical country - I've actually had quite a few posts saved up for a while now. Of course, I may find some time to do some holiday-related posts but we'll see.

In the meantime, I hope you all have a great month while I'm away, wherever you are and whatever you're doing. My friends and family in the UK, and indeed many more in other northern countries, will of course be shivering away in temperatures of -10°c or so, but spare a thought for my wife and I if you will, sweating and burning in the tropical heat of summertime Brazil...

Arcade Platform Games #2

Wardner (1987)
By: Taito Genre: Platform Players: 1 Difficulty: Medium
Featured Version: Arcade First Day Score: 61,440
Also Available For: MegaDrive, Famicom Disk System

I think it's safe to say Taito have introduced a good few memorable games and characters over the years but Wardner must be considered one of their more obscure offerings. It's a side-scrolling platform adventure and stars a portly young chap who goes by the name of Dover who's out for a stroll with his girlfriend when a mysterious cloaked fellow appears and beckons them to follow him with stories of an awaiting 'fantasia'. Sure enough, the rapscallion has tricked them and swiftly kidnaps Dover's better half (but not before turning her into a crystal ball for some reason) and whisks her off to the evil wizard, Wardner. Predictably enough, it's now up to the girl's porky boyfriend to pursue the foul creatures responsible and rescue her (and hopefully turn her back into a human again too).

Some potatoes attack on the pleasant first stage...

To reclaim his bit of stuff, Dover will need to brave five fairly large, scrolling stages. Adhering to platform game law, the first stage is set in a grassy/wooded area but it's quite a nice one featuring lots of small floating platforms and vines to climb before unexpectedly moving on to pools of gunky red 'water' and clouds with deadly lightning strikes. The second stage takes place in some sort of warehouse or industrial facility which contains more hazards than enemies, such as conveyor belts, whirling buzz-saws, steam-vents, and spiked presses. The third stage is similar to the first except there's much less climbing involved and things are far more fiery with tiny moving platforms floating on lava, pillars of fire, and fireballs raining from the sky. The fourth stage sees you entering Wardner's castle which is pretty much a giant maze of platforms and ladders. Successfully navigating this stage will lead you to the final stage in the depths of the basement beneath the castle.

There's more obstacles than enemies in this stage...

The stages are all timed and the exit of each is locked. To obtain the key you must defeat the dragon that guards the end of each. Dover's only means of attack throughout the game is his ability to throw flames. These are rather droopy to start with and have a rather short range but their power can of course be significantly upgraded. This is done by collecting the golden orbs that are frequently left behind by defeated enemies or by purchasing a power-up from the shop that appears between stages. There are several items on offer here and there are others that can also be found all-too-rarely during the states such as the Magic Mantle (one-hit shield), Needle and Yarn (strengthens the Mantle to a two-hit shield), Clock (gives you infinite time to complete a stage), and a Golden Fairy (enemy-damaging companion).

Yep, there's even a time-limit in the shop!

There's also a couple of rather unusual power-ups that appear just once like the Ocarina that summons a large bird to carry you through much of stage three and another that allows Dover to jump many times higher than normal, but just once. As well as golden orbs, defeated enemies often leave behind bags of money and these, along with the treasure chests that are sprinkled through the stages, are what you use in the shops to buy some (but not all) of these power-ups. The enemies are quite numerous through most of the game and stages each have some that are unique to it. The first stage, for example, features what appears to be flying Mr Potato Head's, the second is the only place you'll find hunchbacks and birds, the third has skeleton warriors with shields, and the fourth is home to toucans and jumping eggs.

The Mighty Eagle carries me over pits of fire...

There are of course also several enemies that appear in more than one stage such as fireball-spitting cloaked dudes, rock-men, and bats, as well as the dragons which appear increasingly frequently as you advance through the stages, and of whom there are several different types. Fortunately, very few of the enemies regenerate as it's a pretty tough game already. Control of Dover is superb, although jumping in cramped spaces can cause a bit of a problem, but it's a very fair game regarding collision-detection and re-start points which helps a great deal and will encourage continued play, or at least it did with me! Having said that, the graphics are a little disappointing. Not technically as you can probably see - they're well-defined and fairly detailed, and the animation's not bad. I just don't find them particularly appealing.

Is it worth braving two rock-men for that treasure?

The first and third stages look quite similar, for example, as do the fourth and fifth, and some of them such as the third are full of drab greys and browns. Even Dover himself is clad in light-brown attire! The music is a bit more appealing though - each stage has its own tune and the sound effects are pretty good too except for a horrible noise used in place of speech which is somewhat akin to someone scraping their fingernails down a blackboard! It's definitely a good game overall though and I enjoyed playing through it a lot. I think my favourite thing about it is the variety between stages - jumping across vines on the first stage, dodging obstacles on the second, navigating the maze of the fourth, etc. As far as I know, Wardner isn't a well-known game but it's nicely-designed, not too frustrating, and pretty addictive. If you're a fan of platformers you should give it a try - you may be as pleasantly surprised as I was.

RKS Score: 8/10

Early Driving Games #5

Battle OutRun (1989)
By: Sega Genre: Driving Players: 1 Difficulty: Hard
Featured Version: Sega Master System
Also Available For: Nothing

I'm not sure why but I'm in a bit of an OutRun mood at the moment. It could just be because OutRun rules more than anything else ever, but is that true of every game that carried the famous name? I took a look at the best games in the series with the recent Top Five OutRun Games, but you may have noticed that Battle OutRun isn't there. In fact, there's a good chance that many of the world's gamers won't even have played it as it was apparently only released in Europe. Seems a bit strange to me - surely if any game in the series should only be released in Europe, the logical choice would be OutRun Europa? Perhaps it's because the rest of the world didn't want it. After all, OutRun hardly has a glowing track-record on home systems...

The first thing you may notice about this game is that it uses a Ferrari F40 as the player's car, much like Turbo OutRun did which was released the same year. Aside from that, things initially look very familiar. Except for a screen prior to play which seem to indicate the existence of an enemy vehicle. Indeed, it soon transpired that a famous racing game which was heavily influenced by the original OutRun has in turn influenced this sequel to OutRun! The game in question is of course Chase HQ so, as you may have guessed, the 'Battle' part of Battle OutRun's name, as well as the game's casual reference to an enemy car, means that this is also a racing/combat game - you get 150 seconds with which to catch up with the enemy, then smash him off the road, just like Taito's game. Of which there is already a fine conversion on the Master System.

Since you're playing the game as bounty hunter, there's also some money involved. You start with $3,000 and each time you defeat a 'mobster' you'll get some more, with the amount increasing as you get further into the game. This money can be spent in the 'Parts Shop' which is actually a big truck that turns up mid-way through each stage. Here, you can buy upgrades to your body, tyres, engine, and chassis (the latter of which doesn't seem to do an awful lot), as well as outfit your car with some good old nitrous oxide! Most of the upgrades are necessary to be able to keep up with the bad guys too, one of whom occupies each of the eight stages spread across the US (and a ninth which appears upon successful completion of the rest).

Like Chase HQ (and OutRun, I suppose!), each stage is a point-to-point race along highways filled with civilian vehicles as well as lots of (indestructible) cars driven by henchmen of that stage's 'boss' who will try to prevent you from catching him up. Each stage also features some sections with ramps although I'm not entirely sure what these are for - there's not anything to jump over and they don't really cause you any problems either. A bit more troublesome are the seemingly random oil spills and yellow boards that are usually placed around corners. Hitting either of these will cause a reduction in speed much like hitting any of the other cars, and there's also the usual roadside objects such as sign-posts that will cause even bigger problems if you veer off-road and hit them.

Whether you're a fan of OutRun or Chase HQ, there's nothing here that will surprise you too much. The big question must therefore be, is it better than either of them? The Master System already hosts good conversions of both games after all. Graphically it's a mixed bag. On the one hand, the cars all look pretty good and are nicely detailed and each stage has its own backdrop. On the other hand, there are few different cars, there's a lot of sprite-flicker (which made getting decent screenshots tough!), the sensation of speed isn't great, and the track-side is completely bare most of the time. While this is helpful for the lack of things to accidentally crash into, it's not very pleasing to the eye! The sound effects are pretty poor too but the music is better. There are four tunes you can choose between prior to each stage (on the car radio, of course) and they're not bad. I particularly like the second one and I'm sure any player will be able to find one they like too.

As far as playing it is concerned, the first thing I noticed is how annoying the henchmen cars are! They home-in on you as you approach them to overtake and cause a big reduction in speed if you hit them, and it's even possible to hit the same car three of four times in succession - grrr! Aside from this great source of frustration though, Battle OutRun is actually a fairly enjoyable game. There's enough stages to keep you busy for a good while and although it's a pretty tough game too, even near the start, you can play the eight stages in any order you like. As it stands though, those bloody henchmen cars do exist and they're a pain in the damn arse, so it's a hard game to recommend. OutRun fans should definitely give it a try, for the sake of completion if nothing else, but everyone else should probably try Chase HQ itself first.

RKS Score: 6/10

Film Review #35

Gran Torino (2008)
Director: Clint Eastwood Starring: Clint Eastwood, Bee Vang, Ahney Her, Christopher Carley, Doua Moua, Brian Haley, Geraldine Hughes, Dreama Walker, John Carroll Lynch, Chee Thao, Choua Kue, Brian Howe, Scott Eastwood

Certificate: 15 Running Time: 9? Minutes

Tagline: "Ever notice how you come across somebody every once in a while you shouldn't have messed with?"

He's been on our screens for over fifty years now, playing a huge variety of roles across most genres, but this film is apparently the last time we'll ever clap eyes upon the great Clint Eastwood. Unless we happen to know him in person, of course. He stated before Gran Torino was released that it was to be his last acting role, and at 78 years old who could blame him? A statement like that does bring with it a certain degree of expectation though. That may be true of any Clint film but his last ever? His legions of loyal fans will have been expecting nothing but the greatest of send-offs! Luckily for me I didn't find all this out until after I saw the film so I didn't go in with such an unreasonable level of expectation.

"Get the hell off my muvvafukkin lawn, beeyatch"

The car of the title is the most prized possession of Walt Kowalski (Eastwood, believe it or not), a Korean war veteran and retired Ford factory worker who, having been recently widowed after 50 years of marriage, now lives by himself in a formerly-white working-class part of Detroit which is now mainly populated by Asian immigrant families. Walt's two sons, Mitch (Haley) and Steve (Howe), disappoint him and he thinks even less of his grandchildren, especially teenage Ashley (Walker). He spends most of his time sitting on his porch with his dog, Daisy, grimacing disapprovingly at near enough everything, but particularly the large Hmong family who live next door who look upon him with little more affection.

"What in the blazes do you want, young rapscallion?"

Two of the younger members of the Hmong family are teenagers, Thao (Vang) and older sister Sue (Her). The latter is a bright and confident young girl while the former is quiet and reserved. A bigger problem is that his cousin, Spider (Moua), is head of a Hmong street gang who are hassling him to join them. He reluctantly agrees to a 'trial' with them which involves stealing Walt's beloved Gran Torino. Suffice to say, things get a little more complicated and Walt unwittingly ends up as the hero of the Hmong community, a situation which does nothing to dampen his disdain for them, but a grudging respect gradually begins to form as Walt sees a way of atoning for some of his haunting memories of war.

Sue brings Walt to a family meal...

Considering what little I knew of the film beforehand I was surprised to find that it's actually quite a slow film, particularly the first half, but the story and characters soon grab hold. The quality of the production was already assured with Mr. Eastwood's involvement too, and accordingly the extras are all played by Hmong actors and much of the crew is Hmong as well. Most of the cast have little to do, with the screen-time dominated by Walt's two young Hmong neighbours, Father Janovich (Carley), the young and inexperienced priest to whom Walt's late Catholic wife became close, and of course Walt himself. Clint fans will certainly appreciate his performance here. His character seems to have shades of several of his previous characters but it's a rather controversial one too.

The Hmong gang try to convince Thao to join them...

Walt is a unashamedly racist for one thing. He growls disapprovingly, speaks his mind including flagrant racist terms, and doesn't even try to conceal his disgust at most of the people and events around him, much of which is related to the multi-ethnic nature of his neighbourhood. Eastwood plays him as well as any of his previous best roles - I'm sure no one needs me to extol the virtues of his acting talent but he's looking his age, probably more than his age in fact, and I've never seen (or heard) him as 'grizzled' as he is here. It's a captivating performance though - the minute he growls "Get... off... my... lawn" you just know he can back it up! How many other 78 year old's could seem as genuinely menacing as a disgruntled Walt Kowalski? It's a captivating film as well. Most of Eastwood's characters are hugely cheerable and this one, last on-screen performance or not, is among his most memorable.

RKS Score: 8/10

Scrolling Fighting Games #6

Final Fight (1989)
By: Capcom Genre: Fighting Players: 1-2 Difficulty: Medium
Featured Version: Arcade First Day Score: 925,419
Also Available For: SNES, Mega CD, Game Boy Advance, Sharp X68000, Amiga, Atari ST, Commodore 64, Amstrad CPC, ZX Spectrum
Download For: Wii Virtual Console, Xbox Live Arcade, PlayStation Network, Apple iOS

In recent years, Capcom have probably been most famous for their Resident Evil games. Through most of 90's it was the Street Fighter series, but before all of the many, many incarnations of these games, one of their most popular games was a scrolling fighting game which was so revered that it pretty much single-handedly formed the basis for Sega's decision to create the Streets of Rage (Bare Knuckle) series! This game was of course Final Fight and it's a game that I'm ashamed to say I had never played properly until a recent visit by my good friend Luke. In my defence, I was a Sega fanboy during the years in question but it's still no excuse really. To make amends, an hour or so of two-player ass-whooping ensued with the following discoveries.

It's on! Once someone moves these pesky drums...

Apparently the game is set during the same period as the original Street Fighter tournament and is based in Metro City where ex-wrestler, Mike Haggar, has recently become mayor. The leading gang in the city, Mad Gear, decide to send a message to Haggar by kidnapping his daughter, Jessica. This of course doesn't have the desired effect and instead sees Haggar set out to bring down the heinous gang along with Jessica's boyfriend, Cody, and his sparring partner, Guy. However you try to tart it up, it's a pretty weak story which had been heard numerous times before and would be heard many more times in the future. It's enough to get you playing though, but first you must choose which of the three protagonists you want to play as!

That'll teach me for gawping!

I already had a feeling that Luke would choose to fight as the mighty Haggar himself due to his immensely powerful wrestling moves so that left me to choose between the two martial artists - the quick and agile Guy or the jack-of-all-trades Cody. I went for the former and we got stuck straight into the action! The start of the game sees our heroes and some Mad Gear gang members, Jessica in tow, separated by some steel drums. This stand-off doesn't last long though as the suddenly Jessica-less goons set upon the mayor and his associate for the start of six fairly long rounds which are set all over the fictional city from the slums and the west side, through subways, parks, and bars, to industrial facilities and the bay area.

That's not very environmentally-friendly... 

Mad Gear initially seems to be a mere street gang whose numbers are made up of punks, thugs, and crack-hoes of various descriptions, but as you get further into the game, as well as getting more numerous, you'll find a few who are a bit more professional and militaristic. Wherever in the game the enemies appear though, most of them merely attack with punches, kicks, and throws but there are a few who use knives or even firebombs! Our three heroes all have their own unique set of moves, of course, which include a multitude of punches and kicks as well as throws, multi-hit combos and special attacks. There's also a good helping of weapons such as knives, pipes, and swords they can use which can frequently be found laying around or, perhaps more commonly, in the wreckage of the many objects such as phone boxes, dustbins, and billboards that can be destroyed.

I slash you with my katana to prove I'm right...

There are some other items to look out for too including a variety of foods and drinks for recovering some energy as well as jewellery and gems for bonus points. Like most fighting games though, it's not a complicated affair, with the object simply being to beat the crap out of anything that moves! Each player character has some rather satisfying moves to learn, which doesn't take too long and, while I did have a quick go with Haggar and Cody, I think Guy remains my favourite. The enemy characters are pretty good too. There's around eight different types but also several different designs of each too, so there's a surprising amount of variety during the stages.

Three Hugo's from SFIII ambush us!

The bosses are pretty varied too. They can be found at the end of each round as always and some of these, whilst perhaps a little unusual, are mostly a real challenge. They're usually armed (although there's often weapons lying around for you to use too) and, like the standard enemies, have their own energy bars, but this time much longer! Some of them have gone on to greater fame in the Street Fighter Alpha (Zero) series such as samurai wrestler, Sodom, and pesky Red Beret special forces goon, Rolento, but the others are fairly memorable too like the porky machine-gun-wielding cop at the end of round three. One of the standard enemies even starred as a playable character in Street Fighter 3! Talking of bonus points, there's also bonus rounds at the end of the second and fourth stages which charge you with destroying first a fancy car and then a load of glass panes within a strict time limit.

Haggar has fainted at the naughty minx's antics!

I'm sure everything sounds very familiar so far, even if you haven't played the game before, but lets not forget - many of these things are so familiar because Final Fight invented them, or at least popularised them! Even I, as a loyal Streets of Rage player, am able to acknowledge that. My experience with Sega's series has perhaps dulled the impact Final Fight has had on me but it's still clear to see what a fantastic game it was, and still is. It still looks really nice for one thing. The backgrounds are mostly very urban or industrial with great attention to detail (like graffiti and posters all over the place, for example). My favourite stage is probably the one that takes place on a subway train, although I'm not sure how barrels ended up on it!

These portly chaps have some anger issues...

The big and distinctive sprites found here have long been popular too. They're animated quite well and as mentioned there's a few different 'skins' for each type of enemy as well. Some of them have some rather creative moves, especially the crack hoes, Roxy and Poison (who were censored in some Western versions) who flip and leap all over the place, and there's a few nice special effects that would reappear in later Capcom fighting games such as someone getting engulfed in flames - eeek! One area of the game that disappointed a little, though, was the audio. The music and sound effects are pretty good but after being spoilt by Streets of Rage (especially the second game), they seem a little bit anonymous. Still, I'm sure they would've been fantastic if I hadn't played Sega's game first!

Flashing your boobs won't save you now!

There's no doubting the quality of the game though. Nearly everyone except for Sega owners got to play a home version of it, hence Streets of Rage, but playing it for the first time after all these years reveals a fairly simple but very well-made game that hasn't aged at all. The stages themselves are fairly generic, much like the ones in Sega's game, but the actual fighting seldom gets either boring or overwhelming. It is very satisfying though - each character has their own strengths of course but all are enjoyable to use (although it's hard to beat Haggar's piledriver and suplex moves!). It's just a shame the series quickly went downhill - I guess Capcom were concentrating elsewhere by then - but this first entry in the still-respected series is a frickin' awesome one!

RKS Score: 9/10