Top Five Fast and Furious Babes

As my last film-related Top Five post probably indicated, I'm quite keen on the Fast and the Furious series. Despite how silly they might be, laughably so at times, I suppose they must still have just the right balance of things I like - appealing characters, explosive action, top soundtracks, and lots of nice stuff to look at. This includes all the crazy customised cars that litter the series, obviously, and I'm sure the ladies can appreciate the various male stars, but for me and other such fans the many and varied girlies are right at the top of that list. Satisfyingly for feminists, no doubt, they're not just there to look pretty either - most of them get just as much to do as the guys - the fact that they look nice while doing it is just a bonus! To that end, here are my favourites from the series (so far):

Spoiler Alert: the movie-related Top Fives featured here obviously assume that you've seen the films in question or don't mind knowing about their most prominent moments so don't come whining to me if they ruin a film that you haven't seen yet!

5 - Gisele (Gal Gadot)

Introduced in the fourth film as an ex-Mossad agent and then the antagonist's bit of stuff, Gisele soon develops an interest in Dominic. He isn't interested of course, having only just discovered the death of his girlfriend, but it doesn't stop her warning him of imminent danger at the film's climax; a gesture repaid when Dominic saves her life. From thereon in she becomes a member of Dom's team, before long hooking up with the ever-munchy Han, forming a mighty useful team in the process. Happily, she's also featured in all subsequent films too. Hooray!

Doujin Shmups #8

Ray-Hound (2007)
By: Hikware Software Genre: Shooting Players: 1 Difficulty: Easy-Medium
Featured Version: PC First Day Score: 160,800
Also Available For: Nothing

As usual, the hi-res graphics don't like being resized...

Since beginning coverage of the immense ocean of fan-made games here at Red Parsley I've discovered some impressive but somewhat generic titles, but also a few creative, slightly more unusual efforts. The oddly-named Ray-Hound is definitely one that falls into the latter category. While technically a shmup, it also contains strategic and puzzley elements, and even features mandatory mouse controls! There are no intros or options or anything like that though - when you start the game you'll find yourself in control of a small rocket which starts the game in the middle of a circular 'arena' featuring a hexagonal honeycomb pattern and measuring approximately three screens in diameter. Somewhere within this arena are several gun turrets which automatically track your ship and fire lasers at it in a repeating pattern. The object on each of the many stages is simply to destroy all the gun turrets within the time limit. The only problem is, your ship has no weapons!

Lynx Round-Up #1

Not long ago I spent a good while playing many arcade conversions on Atari's bulky handheld which culminated in a list of what I felt were the best ones - the Top Five Lynx Arcade Conversions. However, if there's any system that's famous for how much of its back-catalogue is made up of games of this type it's the Lynx, and, as I learned, there are more than just five good ones! To that end, here's a random selection of five more including, I hope, some corkers:

APB (1990)

This overhead cops 'n' robbers game was was an eye-catching and intriguing title in its day which saw you, as 'Officer Bob', charged with taking down a set quota of wrongdoers per stage. There were a few conversions (including an excellent Speccy effort) but, like most Atari coin-ops of the day it also saw a release on the Lynx where, to my surprise, its vertical view is not used. This means the action is confined to barely two thirds of a horizontally-viewed game area and accordingly things are quite a bit slower than the nippy arcade game and feature less-complex stages as well, but that doesn't mean it's any easier! Indeed, you're not playing a rogue cop so anything you do remotely wrong earns you a 'demerit', and enough of these can swiftly result in you being fired and therefore game over. APB is tough and can often be frustrating, but it's a decent conversion all things considered, and also proves to be a fairly original and rather addictive overhead racer... 7/10

Overhead Racers #14

Championship Sprint (1986)
By: Atari Genre: Overhead Racing Players: 1-2
Difficulty: Medium Featured Version: Arcade
Also Available For: Commodore 64, Amstrad CPC, ZX Spectrum
Download For: PlayStation Network

'Super' and 'Championship' - both great title screens...

It was a long time ago now but I'm quite confident the first time I ever played an example of an overhead racing game was when I received a a shiny cassette copy of Super Sprint for my Speccy sometime back in the late 80's. It ruled and it wasn't long before I sought out - and found, surprisingly - the mighty arcade machine from which it was derived. This ruled even more as it came equipped with three whirly steering wheels with which three players could wage an asphalt-based war. However, later the very same year that Atari released this instant-classic, they also released another game called Championship Sprint which was far less well-known. It even came bundled with my Speccy version of Super Sprint but I don't remember ever getting around to playing it. As with so many other such related matters though, it's lingered somewhere in my mind until today when this very blog gives me the chance to finally see just how different it is from its big brother.

3DO Games #5

Return Fire (1994)
By: Silent Software Genre: Strategy / Shooting Players: 1-2 Difficulty: Medium
Featured Version: 3DO
Also Available For: PlayStation, PC

The culmination of RF's dramatic title sequence...

As technically impressive as the 3DO was for its day, it's a sad fact that anyone who met the rather immense outlay required to own one had little in the way of high-quality games to play on it, and even less that actually made use of the new machine's impressive abilities. One game that appeared to do just that, however, was Return Fire, and it was an exclusive too! Well, until the 3DO started floundering at least, at which point it was also released on the PS1 and PC, but still - for a while, 3DO owners had something to show off, and it was a game worthy of envy. It's a simple military-based strategic frolic at heart which pits two forces against one another - green and brown. Player one controls the latter while a second player or the console itself controls the former, and the object is simply to seize your opponent's flag and return it to your base. As you might expect, however, it's not quite that simple.

Adult Games #3

Gals Panic! (1990)
By: Kaneko Genre: Puzzle Players: 1-2 Difficulty: Medium
Featured Version: Arcade First Day Score: 38,000 (one credit)
Also Available For: Nothing

The more I look into these so-called 'adult games', the more I discover the same old formula. Take a liked, well-known, simple title, copy it, and add some naked (or at least scantily-clad) girlies while doing so. It's not a very complicated process and neither are the games that generally result from such unions. Arriving courtesy of the reasonably-prolific Japanese arcade outfit, Kaneko, this effort graced a small number of the world's arcades at the start of the 90's and followed a similar trend. The game on which it's based is Taito's classic 'space-filling' puzzler, Qix, and that means that, unless executed with exceptional incompetence, it should at least be a pretty darn addictive game!

Top Five Master System Arcade Conversions

Some of the harsher critics of Sega's charming Master System might suggest that one of the few reasons to own one would be for the generally splendid quality of its arcade conversions. Many of these were conversions of Sega's own arcade games of course but, strangely, it wasn't the only place to find most of these. Games such as OutRun, Space Harrier, After Burner, Shinobi, etc, could be found on the NES, PC Engine, and other rival systems which meant the MS didn't always host the finest home versions of their games. It did still receive some spiffing conversions though, and here are five of the best:

Games-Related Top Fives Disclaimer: I've traditionally stuck to the games I know and love so far, and these game-related top fives reflect that. One of the purposes of this blog is diversify my gaming experiences, to play games I haven't played before, so I will do new game-related top fives in a few years to see how different they are!

5. R-Type (1988)

Considering its popularity, I've always found it amazing that R-Type was never converted to more systems, especially certain consoles. The PC Engine version is of course amazing (although split over two HuCards) but, unless you were lucky enough to own NEC's box of tricks, this MS version has long been widely regarded as the next best thing, and such a reputation is more than deserved. It suffers from the usual sprite-flicker, some sprites are a bit smaller, and the scenery and background graphics disappear to accommodate the large bosses, but apart from these points the MS has produced a splendid version of Irem's classic. The stages are well reproduced (and there's even a secret one!), the music is great, and the most difficult part of the arcade version to duplicate - the fancy graphics and large bosses - are also mighty impressive. A sterling effort then, and one of the best shmups on the MS.

Shinobi Series - Part 5

Shadow Dancer (1990)
By: Sega Genre: Platform/Fighting Players: 1 Difficulty: Easy-Medium
Featured Version: Sega MegaDrive / Genesis First Day Score: 395,200
Also Available For: Nothing
Download For: Wii Virtual Console

It at least has a better title screen...

Sega's mighty MegaDrive was their most popular console and one of the reasons for that is the many ultra-spiffing arcade conversions it played host to. Among these must surely have been the second Shinobi game which had graced arcades of the world around the time the MD itself was being unleashed. Oddly, however, Sega instead opted to release a mostly-new game bearing the same name, but with the added subtitle of 'The Secret of Shinobi'. They seem to have had some trouble deciding whether to follow the same story or not though. The hero in the white pyjamas is either the legendary Joe Musashi in the UK version, or Hayate (Joe's son, as in the arcade game) in the Japanese version, both of which grace my collection. The objective in both versions is more akin to the original Shinobi than its sequel though, which sees you rescuing various hostages taken by evil terrorist organisation, Union Lizard, who have occupied New York City and run amok.

Arcade Shmups #17

Raiden (1990)
By: Seibu Kaihatsu Genre: Shooting Players: 1 Difficulty: Hard
Featured Version: Arcade First Day Score: 96,400 (one credit)
Also Available For: PlayStation, PC Engine, FM Towns Marty, Lynx, Jaguar, Falcon, PC

For the longest time now I've been meaning to give the much-revered Raiden a thorough once over. I've played it a couple of times over the years and, while it never exactly blew me away, it did tickle me enough to leave this nagging desire to dissect it properly. Its name is arguably more famous than the game itself, which is understandable since, as well as giving rise to a long series, it also happens to mean 'Thunder and Lightning' in Japanese! A fearsome name like that certainly gives it a lot to live up to but you wouldn't know it from the story which is the usual nonsense: set in 2090, you (and a friend) are charged with seeing off some invading alien buffoons called the 'Cranassians'.

Commodore 64 Games #3

Gribbly's Day Out (1985)
By: Andrew Braybrook / Hewson Consultants Genre: Platform / Action Players: 1 Difficulty: Hard
Featured Version: Commodore 64 First Day Score: Nothing :(
Also Available For: Nothing

Although I never owned a C64 at the time, I did frequently see games featured in multi-format magazines of the day, and one that always appealed to me was this one, thanks mainly, I don't doubt, to the peculiar main character I saw in screenshots and adverts. More recently I've discovered that he's something called a Blabgorian and has the rather splendid name of Gribbly Grobbly. His job, at least insofar as his game is concerned, is to locate and rescue infant Blabgorians called Gribblets which apparently have a tendency to leave their home in search of adventure. Blabgor is not a safe place though, so Gribbly needs to recover the careless oafs as quickly as possible, and since there are eight of them on each of the sixteen stages that make up the game, it's quite a challenge that faces him as well.

Film Review #50

The Place Beyond the Pines (2013)
Director: Derek Cianfrance Starring: Ryan Gosling, Bradley Cooper, Eva Mendes, Dane DeHaan, Emory Cohen, Ray Liotta, Ben Mendelsohn, Rose Byrne, Mahershala Ali, Bruce Greenwood, Harris Yulin

Certificate: 15 Running Time: 140 Minutes

Tagline: "If you ride like lightning you're gonna crash like thunder"

Usually it takes it certain kind of film to draw me to the cinema. I can't talk for any of you but doing so has become an expensive business in my part of the world, costing almost as much as a new DVD in fact. The Place Beyond the Pines is not the kind of film that usually succeeds in enticing me - as much as I love films, I'm usually pretty patient and therefore often wait until a film's arrival on home media - but there was something about this particular release. I'm not sure what either; I wouldn't call myself a particular fan of anyone involved and I hadn't even seen a trailer, I just knew I wanted to see it, so that's what I did, knowing almost nothing about it. Even the beginning of the film itself offered few clues, opening on a heavily-tattooed fellow swishing a flick-knife around in a cramped room as though killing time before abruptly pinning it to a wall and exiting what it's now clear is a trailer in a fairground.

Maze Games #10

Pulsar (1981)
By: Gremlin / Sega Genre: Maze / Shooting Players: 1 Difficulty: Medium-Hard
Featured Version: Arcade First Day Score: 10,150
Also Available For: Nothing

Considering I'm supposed to be a Sega fan, there's an embarrassing amount I don't know about their early years and the games released during that time, and this rather obscure title is a great example of that. I hadn't even heard of it until recently but as soon as I did I sought it out expecting it to be some sort of Space Invaders clone. Happily, I actually found that it's a maze game - a genre on which I'm strangely keen. If there's a story I've no idea what it is - the flyer shows several 'cool dudes' standing around a Pulsar machine while the cabinet artwork shows what looks like that Silver Surfer guy shooting lightning from his hand.

Bomberman Series - Part 9

Bomber Boy a.k.a. Atomic Punk, a.k.a. Dynablaster (1990)
By: Hudson Soft Genre: Maze Players: 1 Difficulty: Medium
Featured Version: Nintendo Game Boy
Also Available For: Nothing

Usually with any long-running videogame series, the first few sequels stick to the same format as the original game while trying to add to it and improve it, but with the Bomberman series the opposite seems to be true. It was among the first few years of the franchise that Hudson experimented with it, trying new styles, features, even main characters, before settling into the routine that would comprise the later and more successful years of their hero's games. I've already looked at a few of these spin-offs earlier in this series of features, the last of which was exclusive to the Game Boy. Nintendo's handheld was blessed by another visit from our explosive friend though, and this game would be a bit more familiar to fans of his better known outings. Indeed, despite again being released outside its native Japan in a Bomberman-less guise, Bomber Boy was unmistakably a Bomberman game, but was it a good one? As always, I was eager to find out...

SNES Platform Games #4

Mr. Nutz (1993)
By: Ocean Genre: Platform Players: 1 Difficulty: Medium-Hard
Featured Version: Nintendo SNES First Day Score: 75,630
Also Available For: MegaDrive, Game Boy, Game Boy Color

As far back as their very earliest days, most platform games have been based around a hopefully-appealing character, and after the success of Sonic many of these characters were cutesy anthropomorphic animals as you might expect. This particular game, which was first released on the SNES before receiving ports to the MD and GB, was one of many that featured such a character. He's called Mr. Nutz, he's a squirrel, and there's not really anything exceptional about him. Indeed, immediate impressions of the game are that it's nothing more than a generic bandwagon-jumper-onner. Even the story is rather yawnsome - apparently an evil yeti called Mr. Blizzard is trying to take over the world by freezing it. Mr. Nutz's mission is to stop him. Via some unspecified means. That's it! So, with an unspectacular (albeit cute, as was necessary at the time) main character and a story so uninspiring that I feel embarrassed using that word to describe it, the game has got its work cut out if it's going to impress anyone.

Arcade Round-Up #2

It's been a while since I took a look at an 'adult' came here at Red Parsley - it's not really a subject I invest much time or thought in I suppose (no, really!) - but I did kind of stumble back into the murky world recently when I discovered... well, let's leave that as a surprise for a later post shall we? Before we get there, however, I thought it might be spiffy to return to the setting of the first such game I looked at and investigate some more of the few risqué arcade games that made it out, purely for the sake of completion you understand!

I had intended to look at each one individually, but as I should've guessed from my previous experiences with the genre, limited as they might've been, games that feature any adult material are generally rip-offs of existing games but with some boobs and stuff tacked on as well. It would've therefore been a bit of a waste of effort to devote a whole review to each one. To that end, here's a round-up of the five somewhat dubious examples that probably no one has ever played:

Block Gal (1987)

Any regular visitors here at RP should know of my fondness for bat 'n' ball games, so simply adding a bit o' skin to such a title must mean I'd still find it at least semi-spiffing, right? It makes sense in theory at least, but this effort, published by Sega no less, is the oldest game featured here so I don't hold out too much expectation for the adult content. Indeed, aside from a slightly sultry-looking (but fully-clothed) young lady on the title screen it was a while before I even saw anything at all, for Block Gal initially appears to be a completely normal, non-adult Breakout clone. Its stages feature all the usual stuff and there's a few minor innovations such as the colour of the bricks denoting how many times they need to be hit, but the only adult stuff I found was a pink-haired young lady sprawled on the ground after each stage. She's obscured by flowers at first but each stage you win removes one line of them until after the tenth stage she can be viewed in all her glory, but it's no more explicit than what's been seen in countless anime shows. As a bat 'n' ball game I quite enjoyed this one at first but after a while it reveals itself to be a bit limited and rough around the edges. Passable but don't play it if you're after sexy girlies doing inappropriate things! ... 6/10